


Beautiful and New

by threerings



Series: Strangers To Love [2]
Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: 2015 Russian National Figure Skating Championships, 2015-16 Japan Figure Skating Championships, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Anal Sex, Anxiety Attacks, Developing Relationship, Katsuki Yuuri's anxiety-induced thought processes, Long-Distance Relationship, M/M, Oral Sex, PHICHIT IS THE BEST BEST FRIEND, POV Katsuki Yuuri, Phone Sex, Rimming, Social Media, Texting, Webcam/Video Chat Sex, so much sappy fluff, softest boys
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-17
Updated: 2017-08-07
Packaged: 2018-12-03 06:34:54
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 35,011
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11526576
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/threerings/pseuds/threerings
Summary: After spending an amazing night with Victor Nikiforov after the banquet in Sochi, Yuuri has to deal with the fact that he seems to be suddenly dating his long-time idol and crush.Katsuki Yuuri:PHICHIT!!Katsuki Yuuri:I know it’s the middle of the night and you’re probably asleep but I’m FREAKING OUT.Katsuki Yuuri:Phichit I spent the night with Victor Nikiforov.Katsuki Yuuri:I slept with him.  With Victor.  Nikiforov.Katsuki Yuuri:You need to wake up so I can talk to you about this.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> So this is PROBABLY going to be 4 parts, but I reserve the right to change my mind if the 4th part gets out of hand. 
> 
> I do recommend you read Strangers to Love first.

Yuuri loaded his bags into the trunk of the taxi haphazardly. He climbed into the backseat next to Celestino, and pulled out his phone. He was grateful his coach didn’t seem too upset with him now that they were on the way to the Sochi airport. Yuuri had claimed a hangover that he didn’t really feel, so Celestino didn’t try to make conversation, knowing Yuuri was hardly talkative in the morning normally.

Yuuri knew it was the middle of the night in Detroit, and his roommate was probably asleep, but he had to talk to someone.

**Katsuki Yuuri:** Phichit.  
**Katsuki Yuuri:** Phichit!!  
**Katsuki Yuuri:** PHICHIT!!  
**Katsuki Yuuri:** I know it’s the middle of the night and you’re probably asleep but I’m FREAKING OUT.  
**Katsuki Yuuri:** Phichit I spent the night with Victor Nikiforov.  
**Katsuki Yuuri:** I slept with him. With Victor. Nikiforov.  
**Katsuki Yuuri:** You need to wake up so I can talk to you about this.

A notification popped up on the screen, and at first Yuuri thought it was Phichit answering him, but it was from Victor. His heart thumped in his chest just seeing the man’s name on his phone. Yuuri read both messages from Victor, asking Yuuri to let him know that he caught his flight ok. Yuuri replied that he would.

He thought for a moment, debating before he typed a reply to Victor’s apology. He decided not to hold back. He told Victor spending the night with him would have been worth missing his flight. Victor replied with a heart-eyes emoji that made Yuuri laugh. But before he could think of anything appropriate to send back, another notification floated onto his screen.

**Phichit Chulanont:** Yuuri, what the hell?  
**Phichit Chulanont:** Are you joking right now?

**Katsuki Yuuri:** No, I’m serious. I swear. I slept with Victor.

**Phichit Chulanont:** WOW. WOW. FOR REAL THOUGH?

**Katsuki Yuuri:** I don’t really believe it either.

**Phichit Chulanont:** DETAILS. HOW DID THIS HAPPEN?

**Katsuki Yuuri:** I got drunk.

**Katsuki Yuuri:** At the banquet

**Phichit Chulanont:** Oh. That makes more sense.

**Katsuki Yuuri:** And we danced and then he took me to my room because I was too drunk

**Phichit Chulanont:** Ur a slutty drunk.

**Katsuki Yuuri:** Phichit!

**Phichit Chulanont:** Come on, you know it’s true.  
**Phichit Chulanont:** Remember that frat party I found you in the backyard blowing that volleyball player?

**Katsuki Yuuri:** That’s...ok, fine, but ur not helping!

**Phichit Chulanont:** Wait, so he took advantage when you were drunk!?

**Katsuki Yuuri:** NO.

**Katsuki Yuuri:** He was really sweet. He made me coffee and ordered room service.

**Katsuki Yuuri:** I was barely drunk by the time anything happened.

**Phichit Chulanont:** So?  
**Phichit Chulanont:** What DID happen?

**Katsuki Yuuri:** It was AMAZING. Seriously.

**Phichit Chulanont:** Wait. Did you LOSE YOUR VIRGINITY TO VICTOR FUCKING NIKIFOROV??????

**Katsuki Yuuri:** Umm...kinda.

**Katsuki Yuuri:** Yeah.

**Phichit Chulanont:** OMG.  
**Phichit Chulanont:** Yuuri I’m so proud.  
**Phichit Chulanont:** Talk about living the dream.

**Katsuki Yuuri:** It WAS a dream. Like, perfect.

**Katsuki Yuuri:** But how is this my life? How is this real?

**Phichit Chulanont:** Where are u now?

**Katsuki Yuuri:** In the cab on the way to the airport.

**Phichit Chulanont:** So you already said goodbye?

**Katsuki Yuuri:** yeah

**Phichit Chulanont:** (╥_╥)

**Katsuki Yuuri:** He texted me already

**Phichit Chulanont:** Good sign!

**Katsuki Yuuri:** yeah, I guess.

Yuuri typed and then deleted several different things. The truth was, he didn’t know what to think. Victor had been incredible, not just last night, but this morning. Last night Yuuri had thought, when he’d had any chance to think at all, that they would probably only have the one night together. He’d been more bold than he would have expected not only due to the effect of the alcohol in his system, but also because it was his one and only chance to have Victor for his own. Even if only for a night, it was worth it, he’d thought.

This morning, though, Victor hadn’t acted like Yuuri had expected. He’d been not only kind, but sad. He’d seemed very reluctant to part from Yuuri, and he’d asked for Yuuri’s number and then texted right away. Yuuri didn’t know if he should read anything into that. Victor seemed like he was a genuinely nice guy, maybe he treated all his one night stands like this.

**Phichit Chulanont:** You there?

**Katsuki Yuuri:** Yeah.

**Katsuki Yuuri:** I just don’t know what to think about Victor.

**Katsuki Yuuri:** What do I do now, Phichit?

**Phichit Chulanont:** Ask him to marry you?  
**Phichit Chulanont:** Kidding.

**Katsuki Yuuri:** ha.

**Phichit Chulanont:** Just tell him the truth.  
**Phichit Chulanont:** That you had a great time and want to see him again.

**Katsuki Yuuri:** HOW? He lives in Russia

**Phichit Chulanont:** Well you’ll see him at Worlds, right?

**Katsuki Yuuri:** That’s so far away! I don’t know if I can wait!

**Katsuki Yuuri:** And he might meet someone else before then

**Phichit Chulanont:** Not after he got a taste of Yuuri.  
**Phichit Chulanont:** ( ͡~ ͜ʖ ͡°)

**Katsuki Yuuri:** At the airport. Later

**Phichit Chulanont:** I’m so proud.

Yuuri went through the motions of checking in to his flight and passing through security in a daze. All he could think about was Victor, his mind throwing up images to distract him at inconvenient moments. Victor’s smooth voice rang in his ears. Celestino gave him several strange looks, probably because he was blushing at random.

Yuuri pulled out his phone as soon as he found a seat near his gate. They had cut things pretty close and the plane would probably start boarding soon. He sent a message to Victor to let him know they’d made it. And Victor said he already missed him. Yuuri’s heart jumped into his throat. Surely _that_ meant something, right? That wasn’t what you said to a one night stand, was it? Yuuri chewed his lip in frustration. Yuuri repeated the sentiment back to Victor and tried to think of something else to let him know how very much he wanted to keep this _whatever it was_ going between them. But an announcement in Russian and English came over the loudspeaker and boarding had begun.

When Yuuri was finally seated on the plane he saw Victor had sent him another message, just a kiss emoji. Yuuri couldn’t help lifting his hand to lightly touch his own lips, feeling the ghost of Victor’s on them.

Yuuri was tired, despite the pounding of his heart and the anxiety racing through his veins. He settled into his seat the best he could and closed his eyes. His mind fed him memories of last night, Victor’s laugh and wide smile intermixed with Victor above him, thrusting. Yuuri shifted, grateful for the airline blanket over his lap that hid any embarrassing physical reaction. He replayed how it had felt to have all that attention and force of personality focused on him. Victor’s voice as he whispered to him in Russian. Victor’s eyes watching Yuuri’s program on his phone. “You skate beautifully.” A declaration out of Yuuri’s longest running fantasies.

Eventually Yuuri drifted off, the hard airplane seat seeming to transform into Victor’s body. Yuuri could almost feel Victor’s arms around him in his last moments before slipping completely into dream.

~~~~~

Over twenty hours later, Yuuri stumbled through Detroit Metro in the fog of the international traveler. He followed Celestino through customs and baggage claim and into a taxi. Celestino seemed far too energetic and wanted to talk about Yuuri’s training. He tried to encourage Yuuri not to feel bad about his dismal performance at the GPF and talked up Nationals as a redemption opportunity.

Yuuri barely listened, nodding in what he hoped were appropriate places. The truth was that he didn’t need a pep talk. Something had shifted in him since he broke down in the immediate aftermath of his failure. It was tied up with his night with Victor, so he could hardly explain it to his coach.

But Victor had liked his skating. Victor had said incredible things about his skating, while admitting his flaws. And Yuuri couldn’t stop thinking about Worlds. Maybe his next chance to see Victor depended on him performing well at Japanese Nationals. So he would have to win. There wasn’t another choice. He would do whatever he needed to skate on the same ice as Victor again, and this time hopefully put in a performance he wouldn’t be ashamed for him to see.

Yuuri pulled out his phone. It was early morning in Detroit, so Victor should be awake. He was probably home in St. Petersburg by now, too.

**Katsuki Yuuri:** Made it to Detroit. Finally!

He chewed on his thumbnail as he waited for a response. Then he texted Phichit and Mari to also let them know he had safely landed. He fidgeted some more before opening up Instagram and scrolling through his feed. He followed a few other skaters and saw a bunch of posts about the GPF, congratulating the medalists, complimenting their programs. He had a sudden sick feeling in his gut as he wondered if anyone had posted anything embarrassing from the banquet. He noticed he had some notifications and tabbed over to look at them.

**christophe-gc tagged you in a post**

**christophe-gc started following you**

**v_nikiforov started following you**

**v_nikiforov mentioned you in a comment:** @katsuki_yuuri has skills!

Yuuri noticed he’d also been followed by a bunch of new people. He quickly clicked on the photo Christophe had posted, dread pooling in his stomach. He stared at the screen as it loaded.

Hmm, that was actually...nice. It was a picture of him and Victor, dancing together. They were both smiling widely, arms and legs thrust out wildly, except for where their hands clasped. The caption read. “@v_nikiforov and @katsuki_yuuri cut loose at the GPF banquet!”

Yuuri wanted to keep this picture forever, maybe print it out huge and hang it on his wall. He made a note to get Phichit to do his thing and download it for him later. Yuuri liked the photo and then considered replying to Victor’s comment. He smiled and typed: “But not as many as @v_nikiforov!” He debated adding a winking emoji, but decided to leave the flirting more subtle. He took a deep breath before he hit post.

Yuuri’s phone vibrated with a text.

**Victor Nikiforov:** Yuuri! Glad you made it home safe!

**Katsuki Yuuri:** Yeah almost home. Still in the taxi.

**Katsuki Yuuri:** Saw that picture on Insta.

**Katsuki Yuuri:** we look nice.

**Victor Nikiforov:** WE DO!  
**Victor Nikiforov:** I’m going to bug Christophe to send me the rest of the pictures he took.  
**Victor Nikiforov:** I know he has more.

**Katsuki Yuuri:** I’m glad he didn’t post anything too embarrassing.

**Victor Nikiforov:** I’ll send them to you.

**Katsuki Yuuri:** ok

**Victor Nikiforov:** How was the flight?

**Katsuki Yuuri:** Not bad. I slept the first half.

**Katsuki Yuuri:** The layover in New York was miserable.

**Katsuki Yuuri:** Everything was closed.

**Victor Nikiforov:** I hate that.

**Katsuki Yuuri:** Yeah.

**Katsuki Yuuri:** Nearly home, gotta go soon.

**Victor Nikiforov:** Ok. Call me later?

There was a pause in which Victor typed something and then deleted it. Yuuri waited to see if he would send something, but nothing came. His stomach flipped. But...

**Katsuki Yuuri:** Sure. **Katsuki Yuuri:** In a couple hours?

**Victor Nikiforov:** Perfect.

Yuuri was struggling to get his bags through the door of his apartment when a blurred and frenzied Phichit launched himself across the room and threw himself on Yuuri.

“Oof,” said Yuuri as Phichit threw his arms around him. Yuuri’s suitcase fell over and his garment bag dangled from his hand at an awkward angle as he stood still amidst the onslaught.

“Yuuri! Behold the conquering hero!” cried Phichit.

“Phichit, you do know I came in _last place_ right?”

“I didn’t mean _that_. I was talking about _Victor_! You successfully seduced the man of your dreams!” Phichit released him and stepped back slightly. “You’re a hero and an inspiration to thirsty obsessives everywhere!”

Yuuri blushed and glared at Phichit simultaneously. “I didn’t seduce him; I didn’t even _do_ anything really.”

“Oh, so he just walked up to you and said ‘Yuuri Katsuki, take me now’, did he?”

“Well, umm no, first I got drunk and nearly ran him over a couple of times and then I guess I asked him to dance, maybe.”

“You guess you maybe asked him to dance.” Phichit shook his head. “Yuuri, you spent the night with Victor Nikiforov, the man that 3/4th of figure skating fans would run over their best friend to get in their beds. And you still seem unable to imagine that someone might be attracted to you.”

Yuuri sank onto the couch and buried his face in his hands. “I don’t know what to do, Phichit! I mean, ok, there was the banquet and we were drinking and we were having fun, you know, and then we were kissing and it was great. And I thought, ok, so somehow I have him for one night, so I’m going to make the most of it.”

“And how was it?” interrupted Phichit. Yuuri looked at him wide-eyed. “The sex, Yuuri, how was the sex?”

“Oh. Wow. Great.” Yuuri’s face burned.

“Yeah?” asked Phichit grinning. “Come on, I need more than that. You hooked up with the sexiest bachelor in Russia, you gotta give me something.”

“I...I don’t know. It was hot. He was really sweet. He asked what I wanted, and I...told him.”

“You told him _what_?” Phichit had a look on his face like he was watching one of his favorite TV shows.

Yuuri buried his face into one of the couch cushions. He mumbled his answer into the pillow.

“Yuu-ri.”

“Itoldhimtofuckme,” he repeated, pulling the pillow slightly away from his face. Yuuri didn’t know why it had seemed so much easier to do those things than to talk about them with his best friend. He didn’t mind telling Phichit, in fact he wanted to. He needed someone to talk to.

“Wow, so you asked Victor Nikiforov to pop your anal cherry.” Yuuri groaned in protest at his phrasing. “But he was sweet about it, right?” Phichit continued.

“Yeah. I mean, I didn’t exactly _tell_ him I’d never...you know, before.”

“Yuuri! You’re supposed to tell your partner these things!” Phichit considered. “I mean, I’m still pretty proud of you for asking for it, to be fair. But really, you should probably have warned him.”

“Right. Because I was going to tell Victor Nikiforov how much of a loser he accidentally ended up with.”

“It doesn’t make you a loser, Yuuri,” Phichit chided.

“Yeah, well, anyway, the point _is_ I thought it was just for one night, because, you know, maybe that almost makes sense. But now he’s...I don’t know.” He threw up his hands.

“What?” asked Phichit more gently.

“Well in the morning he was really...he said he didn’t want me to go. Said he had a really great time. And now he keeps texting me, and...well, see for yourself.” He unlocked his phone and passed it over to Phichit.

Phichit read through their texts. “What’s this Russian word?”

“Hmm, krasavchik, I think it was. He said it was ‘beautiful boy.’” Phichit looked pleased and kept reading.

“Ok, I don’t see the problem,” said Phichit when he’d finished.

“It’s not a problem, exactly.” Yuuri sighed. “But he keeps texting, and being nice, and telling me to call him, text him.”

“You mean like someone who is interested in you?” asked Phichit as if Yuuri was an idiot.

“Yes?”

“Nope, still not seeing a problem.” Phichit moved closer to Yuuri on the couch and threw an arm around him. “Yuuri, he _likes_ you. This is not strange. You are a likable person, ok?.”

“But he’s,” Yuuri waved a hand around vaguely, “ _Victor_ , you know?”

“Look. You met him, danced, had fun, and then what, went to your room?” Yuuri nodded.

“He and Chris Giacometti took me because I was drunk.”

“And you said he bought you room service. And you talked?” Phichit was still speaking gently.

“Yeah.”

“What about?” asked Phichit.

“Umm, I dunno, lots of stuff. Where we’re from, living in America. Skating. I...I told him about Vicchan.” Phichit hugged him tightly.

“I’m sorry about that.”

“God, Phichit, I totally cried all over him, too.” Yuuri buried his hands in his hair.

“And what did he do?”

“He...he held me? And said it was...was understandable that I skated badly after that. He talked about Makkachin. His poodle, you know.” Yuuri sniffed a bit but pulled himself upright. “He was _so sweet._ ” he continued softly. “I always knew he was gorgeous, and a genius skater, but I didn’t expect him to be so sweet.”

Phichit was smiling at him. “Yeah, you’re in trouble.”

“What?”

“You’ve got it bad. I can see. And look, so he met this beautiful boy (his words!) and you dance and you talk and you have all this stuff in common, and then you have amazing sex, and you’re wondering why he’s acting like he likes you and wants to stay in touch. It’d be amazing if he didn’t want to talk to you more.” Phichit squeezed Yuuri a little.

“So...what do I do?” Yuuri’s chest felt tight.

“Well, first of all, you call him in...an hour, and you just talk to him. And then you see what happens.”

Yuuri nodded. Phichit was good about cutting through all of Yuuri’s overthinking tendencies. Sometimes it meant him dragging Yuuri along on his latest adventure and sometimes it meant talking him down when he was freaking out. Yuuri leaned over and hugged his friend.

“Thanks,” he said and went to go shower and get unpacked.

~~~~~

It was now exactly two hours and two minutes past the time he’d told Victor he would call. Yuuri had been pacing for the last five minutes, waiting for it to be time, and then waiting some more to make sure he didn’t seem too eager.

He was just debating whether two minutes was long enough to wait to make him seem laid back, when his phone rang. He laughed aloud and picked it up. It was Victor.

“Hi?”

“Hi, Yuuri! I know you said you’d call but I thought I would since I have unlimited international calls. I didn’t know what your situation was like.” Yuuri grinned to himself at the speed with which Victor said all this.

“Oh, thanks, yeah, I was literally reaching for my phone to call. And I _don’t_ have unlimited minutes, though it’s not usually a problem. But thanks.” There was a brief pause.

“So how’s Detroit?” asked Victor and Yuuri thought he heard a little irony in his voice.

“Hmm, about the same as I left it: cold and gray. You’re back in St. Petersburg now?”

“Mm-hmm. Also cold. And currently dark.” We’ve covered the weather, then, Yuuri thought desperately. He couldn’t think of anything at all interesting to say. He let Victor lead the conversation, and they made a little more stilted small talk about travel and then Makkachin. Yuuri remembered how easy things had felt two nights before in his hotel room, with alcohol lubricating things. Maybe he should keep some alcohol on hand so he could be interesting on the phone with Victor.

“Sorry, Victor,” he said finally. “I feel like I’m being really boring right now, but I’m just tired and brain-dead.”

“Oh, no, that’s okay. You have an excuse. I feel like I’m pretty boring right now, too and I slept last night.” There was a pause. “So I guess I should let you go.” Yuuri’s stomach dropped. This was what he’d been afraid of. Victor had been nice, but now they were apart and there was no point in pretending he was interested in Yuuri anymore.

“Yeah, I guess,” he said vaguely.

“I just wanted to hear your voice, again,” said Victor, a bit quietly. Yuuri inhaled sharply. “I...felt like I needed to be completely sure you were a real person and not some kind of...fairy or something.”

Yuuri huffed a laugh. “I thought you might be a hallucination, remember?” Yuuri had asked him if hallucinations could text.

“Oh, yeah. Well I guess I could still be a hallucination and you could just be talking into your phone.”

“Oh, great. Thanks, Victor.” Victor’s laughter rang out over the lines and Yuuri smiled at the sound. “I’m either a fairy or completely insane. Good to know.”

“Or...” and Victor’s voice was lower. “You’re the most interesting and attractive person I think I’ve ever met.” Yuuri didn’t gasp at that, because he was pretty sure his lungs had stopped working. It felt like something clamped down on his chest and wouldn’t let him take in air. His mouth opened and closed, tried to make sounds, but his mind had gone blank. The silence seemed to echoed through the phone.

“Yuuri?” asked Victor, voice uncertain.

“Sorry,” managed Yuuri. “I...Victor, I...” He swallowed and tried desperately to focus. “I’m not sure if the person you met really exists,” he said finally, in a rush.

“Huh?”

“I...I’m not, really...I mean, I had been drinking, and...”

“Oh.” Victor’s voice was flat, emotionless. It sounded...hurt.

“No, I mean, don’t...sorry, I’m fucking up. This is what I mean. I’m really not good at...people. I’m nervous and I get overwhelmed and I’m not confident...” His chest tightened again and he tried to breath through it. “And the other night I was drunk. And that’s a different Yuuri, when I’m drunk. And then I wasn’t that drunk later, but I was still a little and it made things...easier.”

“Oh,” said Victor again, but it sounded less upset than before. “So...you’re not regretting anything, are you?”

“Oh, no. _No._ Definitely not, Victor. Everything was...great. I’m just trying to say...you might not like me... as much...now.” There was a long silence during which Yuuri had to remind himself to breathe.

“Yuuri,” said Victor finally. “That’s...that’s...why would you say that?”

“Umm, because it’s true?”

“No,” said Victor firmly. “Look, I know we didn’t spend a lot of time together, and for some of it you were drunk and for some of it we...weren’t talking, but I...I want to _get_ to know you, Yuuri.”

“What do I have that someone like you would be interested in?” asked Yuuri. He felt like he was spiraling completely out of control, riding the edge of panic. Maybe because he was overtired and hadn’t been able to stop thinking these thoughts during his flight.

“What do you mean someone like me?” Yuuri heard something tight in Victor’s voice.

“Just...you could have anyone,” he said. Victor sighed.

“I don’t want anyone. Trust me, I _don’t._ I have _tried_ anyone. I want _you._ ” Yuuri took a shuddering breath to try to control the emotions that surged through him. Tears prickled behind his eyes. He breathed heavily, knowing Victor could hear him, but unable to speak.

“I’m sorry,” he said finally. “I’m just afraid you won’t like what you see if you get to know me.”

“I disagree.” Victor’s voice was calm and quiet. “Will you trust me, Yuuri? Let me judge for myself?”

Yuuri pressed his lips together to keep from letting out an audible sob. “Okay,” he managed in a small voice.

“Okay,” said Victor, with finality.

“I’m sorry I’m so...emotional,” said Yuuri.

“Stop apologizing. You should probably get some sleep, though.”

“Yeah.” Yuuri was hesitant to hang up the phone just yet, though. “Victor, I...I really had an amazing time with you.”

“Me, too, krasavchik.” Yuuri smiled at the pet name. There was some silence as he tried to will his pulse to slow back to normal. Victor continued after a moment. “What are you doing tomorrow?”

“Oh, back on the ice. Celestino will want to work on that free program.” His tone showed how little he was looking forward to it.

“Yeah, you need to get it perfect so I can see it at Worlds,” said Victor, a smile in his voice. Yuuri ducked his head.

“First I have to win Nationals.” He also wasn’t looking forward to going back home after his shameful performance at the GPF.

“Should be easy; you’re the best skater in Japan, right?” Victor said it like it wasn’t even a question.

“Hmm, maybe. Not if I skate like I did at the GPF.”

“Well, then I’ll wish you luck in your practice. Let me know when you get in, so I can call? If...that’s ok?”

“Ok, yeah.”

“Well, then, goodnight, Yuuri. Get some rest.”

“Goodnight, Victor.” He swallowed. “And, thanks.”

Yuuri ended the call and buried his face in his pillows. He felt like crying, but he also just felt deeply tired. The sound of Victor’s voice echoed through his head and mostly Yuuri couldn’t believe he’d just been talking to his longtime idol on the phone. That might even be weirder than the fact they he’d slept with him. Now they were friends? And talked on the phone? He was chatting about skating with Victor Nikiforov?

Yuuri decided avoidance was his best course, and he tried to pretend it was all a huge hallucination. Maybe in the morning he’d wake up and tell Phichit about this super weird and vivid dream. Yuuri curled up and drifted off, part of his brain replaying the words ‘I want _you_ ’ over and over.

~~~~~

Things did not seem better in the morning. Things seemed much more horrible in the morning. Yuuri woke up before dawn, due to his messed up internal clock. He replayed his conversation with Victor in his head and decided he wanted to die.

He was such an idiot! He got a chance at... _something_ with Victor, and what did he do? He responded to Victor saying he was interesting and attractive by completely falling apart and showing Victor what a mess he really was. All he had to do was play it cool for one phone conversation and he couldn’t even manage that!

Yuuri pulled his covers over his head with a groan. But all he could think about was that conversation. So he got up and changed into workout clothes. He realized he was starving, so he went to make breakfast before going for a run.

When he got back from his run Phichit was up and eating cereal.

“Woah, you’re up early!” he said as Yuuri came through the door. Yuuri just nodded, still out of breath. He was sweating as well, having run much further than his usual distance just to keep himself calm. He stretched out his legs on the floor as Phichit continued to watch him.

“So how was your call with _Victor_ last night? Did you get phone-laid?” Yuuri glared at his roommate but didn’t answer.

“What?”

“Nothing. Just...don’t ask.” Yuuri pushed up and started stripping off layers in preparation for a quick shower before they left for the rink.

“Yuuri! I have to ask. That’s my job, as best friend: to ask.” Phichit had left his cereal in the kitchen and followed Yuuri into his room. “Did he...was he a jerk or something?”

Yuuri sighed. “No.”

“Then?”

“I was the jerk. Maybe. I don’t know, ok, and I really don’t want to talk about it right now.” Yuuri shot a pleading look at his friend, who thankfully held up his hands in surrender.

“Okay, okay. But if you change your mind...” Yuuri shooed him out and then went to shower.

Yuuri spent the rest of the day at the rink. Celestino was still visibly tired from their trip, but he spent the morning working with Phichit since they’d been apart for so many days. After lunch he sat down with Yuuri and they talked through the GPF. Celestino was very nice and understanding about Yuuri’s failure. Yuuri couldn’t be as kind to himself.

But he had a new goal now, one he shared with his coach: he had to get to Worlds. Which meant he couldn’t mess up like that again at the Japanese National Championship. Celestino seemed please with this, though he said he didn’t think Yuuri needed to worry too much. He’d won gold at Nationals the year before and gone to Worlds, though he’d only finished 16th once there. So this year he would need to win gold again in order to qualify to represent Japan in the World Championship.

Once he finally got on the ice, Celestino insisted he run through his free program. Yuuri had been dreading it, his guts clenched at the memory of his body spinning out, the hard landing on his first jump throwing him off entirely.

It wasn’t as bad as he feared. He landed most of his jumps, a couple two-footed, and one touching down with his hand. But it was a grind just to get through the program. He didn’t feel any flow, no emotional connection with his performance. This was purely a drill.

When he was done Celestino shrugged and pointed out a few things to try in specific places. Then they worked on jumps, trying to solidify his landings. Celestino called their session over after a while, but Yuuri lingered while his coach packed up.

“I want to just skate on my own for a while, just try to get comfortable again,” he explained.

“Hmm, ok, but no more jumps, ok?” instructed his coach. “You should be able to get 20 more minutes in before they shut the doors. Can you get back on your own?”

“Oh, yeah, no problem.”

Yuuri was relieved to be alone on the ice. It was rare for him to get this kind of time. Unlike in Hasetsu the rink time was in short supply. Once he was sure his coach was gone, Yuuri started his free program again, the music echoing in his memory. He landed the first jump, but his legs shook under him. So he just marked out the rest, focusing on the footwork instead. It felt better than it had before, but Yuuri wasn’t satisfied with this progress. He still felt completely emotionally disconnected from the piece. It felt wrong.

Yuuri glided around the ice in loose figures, letting the slice of his blades on the well-used ice drown out his thoughts. He only came out of his reverie when he heard someone shouting from the back of the room. It was the manager of the rink, yelling at him to go home.

Yuuri apologized, quickly grabbed his things and changed out of his skates. He was surprised by how dark it was outside until he looked at his phone and saw it was almost six.

On the bus ride back to his apartment he did the math and realized how late that made it in Russia. Victor would almost certainly be asleep already. When he’d asked Yuuri to text him after practice he hadn’t considered the difference in time zones. Or hadn’t expected Yuuri to be skating this late.

Yuuri debated what to do about it. He could send Victor a text now, but it might wake him up. But if he didn’t, wouldn’t Victor think Yuuri had simply forgotten about him entirely? But he probably already thought that, since Yuuri hadn’t texted or called. Victor hadn’t either, though, and he _had_ called him last night. Maybe Victor was secretly relieved not to hear from Yuuri after last night’s failure of a conversation. Yuuri knew _he_ was a little relieved not to have to talk to him again so soon. He had been avoiding thinking about it all day, and therefore he had no idea what to say to Victor.

In an attempt to put off any decision about what to do Yuuri looked through his notifications. He was still getting a lot from Instagram after his brush with Victor Nikiforov’s fame. Actually… he clicked on one of the messages.

It seemed that he was tagged in a new photo. Posted by Victor himself this time. And the picture...it was another of him and Victor dancing, this one of him dipping Victor backwards while Victor kicked his leg up. Yuuri smiled at his phone. Their faces were close and they both looked happy. It was a romantic picture.

And Victor had posted it. His caption was: “Swept off my feet. ♥♥♥ #GPF #skatersarethebestdancers” Yuuri’s hand was covering his mouth to keep from making noise and freaking out his fellow passengers. The post had almost 30,000 likes already. He shouldn’t read the comments. His eye skimmed down.

**phichit-chu** : OMG. That’s my boy!  
**christophe-gc** : #whathappensinsochistaysinsochi  
**nikifanov** : Who’s the dork about to drop my Vitya?

Yuuri flipped his phone over quickly, his cheeks burning. There was a reason he avoided social media and never read his own press. But why had Victor posted it? Was it a message? For him? Yuuri sighed and unlocked his phone again, closing the Instagram window and opening his messages.

**Katsuki Yuuri:** Sorry it’s so late! I’m on the bus on my way home. Forgot about the time difference.

He hit send before he could rethink or change what he’d written. He opened a game to distract himself. It wasn’t like Victor would still be awake. He still felt disappointed when he didn’t receive a reply.

He made it home a short time later, to find Phichit cooking something that smelled amazing.

“Oh, this is what I missed the most while I was gone,” he said as he tossed his gym bag into a corner. “A roommate who cooks delicious food.” Phichit smiled sweetly at him.

“Oh, look, it’s what I missed the most, too! Someone to do the dishes.” Yuuri rolled his eyes, but headed into the kitchen to help out. He was rewarded with a bowl of curry and rice. They ate on the couch.

“Ready to talk about your call with Victor yet?” Phichit asked after a minute or two.

“Ugh. Yeah.” Yuuri didn’t exactly want to talk about it, but he needed Phichit’s supportive advice. “So, I totally fucked up.”

“I doubt that. Did you ask him to marry you?”

“I probably should have. Instead I just...went all insane on him. I mean, crying, panicky mess insane, not fun and kinky insane.”

“What happened?” Yuuri related his conversation with Victor to the best of his memory. By the time he was done Phichit was rolling his eyes.

“Yuuri, have you looked at Instagram today?”

“Yeah?”

“So you saw the picture he posted of you guys? Where you two look like you’re about to bang right there on the dance floor?”

“Yeah,” Yuuri sighed.

“And you saw how he said you swept him off his feet? And he posted that out there in front of God and everybody?”

“You think it means something?” Yuuri asked eagerly.

“Umm, Yuuri, I’m sorry, but you need to wake up. It means the same thing as him telling you you’re the most interesting and attractive person he’s ever met, you idiot! The boy is CLEARLY head over heels.” Phichit put down his bowl and scooted closer to Yuuri, holding eye contact. “Stop. Sabotaging. Yourself.”

Yuuri swallowed nervously at Phichit’s intensity. Phichit went back to his food and Yuuri hurriedly scooped more curry into his mouth.

“So what have you done to try to ruin this amazing potential relationship today?” asked Phichit casually.

“Oh, god, Phichit!” Yuuri crumpled then, burying his face into the couch cushion.

“Tell me.”

“I didn’t text him. He told me to text him when I was done with practice so we could talk and then I stayed late today and so he probably thinks I blew him off.”

“You didn’t text him at all?”

“No, I did, finally in the bus, but I forgot he’s 7 hours ahead until it was too late and so he would have been asleep already.”

“So you texted him and apologized?”

“Yeah.”

“Ok, I think your future husband might just forgive you.”

“But I _was_ totally avoiding him. I couldn’t face talking to him after that terrible conversation last night.”

“Ok, Yuuri, first of all, you were jetlagged and exhausted. Second, he is obviously still interested even after you talked to him and probably even after you didn’t text because he posted that picture on Insta. Third, if all else fails, there’s always phone sex. Just skype him and take off your clothes. I’m pretty sure that would make up for a lot of minor mistakes.”

“Oh god, Phichit, you’re not helping,” Yuuri moaned. “Ok, actually you’re helping a little. The first two parts were helpful. The third thing not as much.” Yuuri opened his mouth to say something else but he was interrupted by a chime from his pants pocket.

He pulled out his phone in a hurry. “Ah, it’s from him!”

**Victor Nikiforov** : Glad everything’s ok. Talk tomorrow?

**Katsuki Yuuri** : Yes, definitely. Txt me when you’re free?

**Victor Nikiforov:** Ok. Goodnight, красавчик.

**Katuski Yuuri** : Goodnight. Go back to sleep. :)

“Ok, Yuuri in love is adorable,” pronounced Phichit. Yuuri startled.

“What?”

“The way you were smiling...too cute.”

Yuuri shot his friend a look, but he couldn’t keep the smile off his face for long. He felt so much better after exchanging those few texts with Victor. It felt like they’d made a connection again. All day Yuuri had been feeling adrift, feeling the enormous distance that separated him and Victor. And the physical distance had seemed to underscore the figurative distance. How far above him Victor was, and how undeserving Yuuri felt of his attention.

But a few words on a screen, and Yuuri felt as if they’d briefly touched. Like Victor had reached out and squeezed his hand or kissed his cheek. Every time he saw the Cyrillic text of the endearment, he heard Victor’s voice murmuring it to him in the dark. Victor, on top of him, inside him, calling him beautiful.

Yuuri went to sleep that night in a much happier place than he had the night before.

~~~~~

 

Yuuri’s phone buzzed as he was getting dressed the next morning.

**Victor Nikiforov:** Are you awake?

**Katsuki Yuuri:** Yeah, just getting dressed.

**Victor Nikiforov:** Ooo, so you’re still partially naked? (-‿◦)

**Katsuki Yuuri:** hmm, do feet count?

**Victor Nikiforov:** Depends on the feet.  
**Victor Nikiforov:** Do you have time to talk?

**Katsuki Yuuri:** A little bit. I have to leave in 30 min.

This was a little bit of a lie. He had to leave in 30 minutes, but he needed to eat breakfast before then. He hated skipping meals, but it was worth it for Victor. His phone rang.

“Hi, Victor,” he answered.

“Yuuri! Hi!” Victor’s voice was bright.

“I’m sorry about yesterday. I stayed late at the rink and didn’t even consider the time difference till I was on my way back.”

“Oh, it’s ok. I asked you to text when you got home, I didn’t really think about it either.”

“Yeah, you’d think I’d be more used to it.”

“You can ask Chris how many times I’ve called him in the middle of the night because I forgot we were on different continents.” Yuuri laughed. He’d never expected Victor would make him laugh this much. He seemed so serious on the ice.

“I guess we’ll get used to it.” He winced, wondering if that implied...too much.

“We need to find a schedule. Do you usually skate later?”

“Oh, it depends. Usually afternoons, but Phichit and I are almost always there for each other’s ice times, so sometimes I’m at the rink for a long time. What about you?”

“Mostly mornings. I’m a morning person.”

“Ugh, not me. I’m still not back on my normal schedule and I’m freaking out Phichit by being awake before my alarm goes off a million times. Half the time he has to come rip my blanket off before I get up.”

“Are you sure I don’t need to be jealous of this Phichit? If he’s uncovering you in bed...”

Yuuri laughed. “Thought we covered that already.”

“Well, I still feel jealous of anyone who gets to be there with you.” Yuuri’s face heated. He didn’t know what to say in response, though.

“Sorry, was that too…?” Victor asked after Yuuri didn’t reply.

“No! No, that...was fine.” He smiled and blushed again. “I just didn’t know what to say.”

“I don’t want to make you uncomfortable,” Victor said, voice still a little worried.

“I...I’m just not used to...this. Sorry.” Yuuri sighed.

“You’re not comfortable with compliments?”

“Umm, I don’t know. I guess not. But...that doesn’t mean I don’t like them.” Yuuri was winding the string of his sneakers around and around his finger nervously. “I just don’t always feel like I deserve them.”

“Well, I think you do,” said Victor in a low voice. It made Yuuri shiver. “So it’s ok if I keep giving you compliments?”

There was a pause while Yuuri pressed his lips together tightly to keep from squealing. “Yes?” he managed finally. Victor laughed gently. “Sorry, I’m still working through that ‘maybe you’re a hallucination’ issue.”

“Ah. Well I’m very sorry I can’t be there in person to convince you of my...solidity.” Yuuri coughed a laugh at the innuendo.

“Yeah, it might be easier if things were more...solid,” he said, hardly believing his daring.

“Krasavchik, you can’t say those kinds of things when we don’t have time.” Victor’s voice was very low, almost a growl, and it went straight to Yuuri’s cock.

“Vic-tor,” he complained.

“Mmm, if I say what I want to say right now we really _will_ get off-track.” Yuuri wanted to hear it anyway. He glanced at his clock.

“Yeah, shit, I don’t have a lot of time. And I probably won’t be back till after 5.”

“Damn!” Victor breathed heavily. “We really are going to have to figure something out. Maybe I’ll have to change my sleep schedule.”

“Oh! You don’t have to do that!”

“But I want to be able to talk to you, Yuuri.”

“Hmm, I’m the night owl. What time do you wake up?”

“Somewhere around 6 or 7 usually.”

“So that would be only midnight here.”

“Are you usually up that late?”

“Yeah, most of the time. Or almost that late. And besides, if I want to sleep in, I can ride the bus to the rink later on my own.”

“Okay, so you want me to call you when I get up?”

“Yeah. I mean, if you want.” Yuuri let his voice trail off, wincing.

“I do, Yuuri. I want to hear your voice.” Yuuri bit his lip, part of him still not believing the things Victor said to him.

“Yeah, me too,” he said quietly. “I should probably go,” he added, looking at the clock by his bed again.

“Okay,” said Victor. “Till tomorrow? Or, I guess, later today for you.”

“Yeah. Bye?”

“Bye, darling,” said Victor before hanging up. Yuuri heart flipped at that. Every time Victor said something sweet or sexy, he thought his heart might stop. Maybe it did, and just started back up a second later. He wondered how he was going to survive this if Victor kept it up. Phichit might find him one day, curled up around his phone, a dreamy smile frozen on his face. Well, it would be a nice way to go.

He finished getting ready and went out to the living room. He dug through the cabinets for something he could eat on the way, finding a protein bar and sticking it in his pocket. Phichit appeared from his room, bag over his shoulder.

He spotted immediately that Yuuri was feeling lovestruck. “Talk to Victor already?”

Yuuri crossed the room and draped his arm around the smaller man, leaning into him.

“Yeah. But Phichit! Victorrr,” he sighed happily. The Thai man laughed next to his ear.

“What about him?”

“He’s so amaaazzzing.”

“Yeah, I know, you’ve been telling me that literally since the day I met you.”

“No, but he’s not Victor Nikiforov Amazing, he’s just...amazing.” Yuuri sighed again. “He keeps saying the sweetest things, and calling me names, and, oh my god, Phichit, I’m so in love with him.”

Phichit laughed. “I can see that. And I hate to ruin your phone-afterglow, but can we get moving? We have a bus to catch.” Yuuri pouted, but allowed Phichit to steer him out of the apartment.

Yuuri tried not to think too much about Victor during practice, but thinking about Victor while he was skating was a long-ingrained habit. For years he’d measured his skating performance against Victor’s until it became automatic to ask himself what Victor would think of that jump or what Victor would say if he could see Yuuri fudge his landing. He’d also used the thought of Victor to motivate him for a long time. His goal had always been to meet Victor as a worthy competitor, to stand in front of his idol and not feel ashamed of his own skating.

He’d utterly failed at that. But...Victor had approved of him anyway. Not on the ice, not as a competitor, maybe, but as a romantic partner. It was both a dream come true and not what he’d expected. It wasn’t that he hadn’t thought of Victor in a sexual way. He definitely had, sometimes at great length. He winced to think of his teenage self, looking up at the posters on his walls and imagining utterly filthy things until he was hard and desperate. But while his admiration of Victor was for both his skating and his looks, Yuuri’s desire to be a skater worthy of Victor had always been far more important to him than wanting to sleep with him.

He wasn’t complaining, he told himself. But he wasn’t satisfied either. He needed to get to Worlds so he could see Victor again, yes. But he also needed to be good enough to redeem himself on the ice, so that Victor wouldn’t just look at him and see someone he wanted to sleep with, but would also see someone whose skating impressed him. If Yuuri was going to be...be involved with Victor Nikiforov, he needed to be someone Victor could be proud of.

Still, Yuuri felt distracted throughout the day, even if he was more motivated than ever. He wanted to rush home even though that wouldn’t make Victor’s phone call come any faster. Phichit obviously noticed his mood once they were home, and he started listing chores for Yuuri to do if he couldn’t keep from fidgeting. Eventually Yuuri decided why not and ended up deep cleaning the fridge and mopping the kitchen floor.

Phichit disappeared into his room around ten, leaving Yuuri to his own devices. Yuuri tried to focus on schoolwork, the internet, and a video game before finally lying on his bed and staring at the ceiling. He knew obsessing over the phone call was a bad idea and would probably lead to getting himself worked into an anxious mess. But he couldn’t help himself.

He tried to keep his thoughts focused on the positive anticipation. He remembered Victor’s flirtations from that morning, their innuendo. He wondered if Victor intended...Yuuri had never had phone sex. He didn’t know how you were supposed to actually do it. And Phichit had mentioned Skype. Yuuri’s face heated at the thought. Could he do that? Put on some kind of show for Victor, for a phone screen?

He chewed on his nails as he considered. His eye landed on one of the posters on his wall. It was placed high on the opposite wall, one of Victor’s more recent posters from last season. Yuuri imagined the Victor in the poster looking down on him, and he brushed a hand across the front of his sweatpants, feeling his cock twitch in response. He was starting to get hard, just thinking about Victor like this. Yuuri glanced at the clock. 11:15. Victor probably wouldn’t be calling yet. But he could, if he woke up early. Yuuri flushed at the thought of Victor calling when he was in the middle of jerking off. No, better to be hard and horny when he called than interrupted and out of breath. Maybe he could do the phone sex thing after all. The thought of Victor watching him, listening to him...it had possibilities.

Yuuri rolled over to try and keep himself from getting out of control. He turned on his phone and scrolled through social media again, not really focusing on things. He had just starting actually paying attention and was laughing at a gif of a dog barking at a leaf when the phone vibrated and rang in his hands and he dropped it.

He fumbled to pick it up and answer the call, which was from Victor, of course.

“Hi,” he answered, breathless.

“Hi, Yuuri!” Victor’s voice was bright as always. “Are you busy? You sound out of breath.” Yuuri’s face heated, remembering his earlier fears.

“Oh, no, I was just laughing at this dog gif.”

“Oh! You should send it to me.”

“Ok. Did you just get up?”

“Yes. I’m still in bed, actually. I called you first thing.”

“Oh!” Yuuri’s mind immediately conjured up an image of Victor lying in a cocoon of rumpled white sheets, chest bare, hair mussed, expression seductive. Yuuri shut his eyes and bit his lip to make himself focus. “I’m in bed, too. Or...on the bed.” He wasn’t sure if that sounded stupid or sexy. He didn’t know if he wanted it to sound sexy.

“Hmm. And are you wearing anything?” Victor apparently was not having the same ambivalence.

Yuuri huffed a laugh. “Yeah, I’m fully dressed still.”

“How disappointing. I’m not wearing anything.” That went straight to Yuuri’s cock and he had to take a breath before he could speak. And then he couldn’t come up with anything to say.

“Oh,” he managed lamely. He winced. “Sorry, I...I don’t know what to say.”

“No, I’m sorry, we don’t have to...we can talk about something else.” There was another moment of silence when Yuuri hesitated. He was feeling so turned on now he couldn’t think of anything else anyway. “Yuuri?” Victor continued when he didn’t speak.

“Don’t apologize,” Yuuri said, and it came out in a low voice he didn’t really recognize. He heard Victor suck in a breath.

“No?” he asked, his tone lower as well. “I just woke up and couldn’t stop thinking about you, and...wanting you.” Yuuri took a long, shaky breath in, rolling his shoulders back.

“I could...take my clothes off?” he offered.

“Mmm,” said Victor immediately. “You should do that.”

“Ok. Hold on.” Yuuri set the phone next to him and ripped his shirt off over his head. He lifted his hips and stripped off his sweatpants as well, leaving him only in socks and underwear. He picked the phone back up.

“Ok, I’m back,” he said. He heard Victor laugh softly.

“You could have put it on speakerphone,” Victor said and Yuuri flushed.

“Oh. Right. Yes, that’s a thing that I could have done.” Victor laughed again and Yuuri chuckled a bit as well. “I don’t know, though, I kinda like this better. It feels more private, somehow.”

“I guess that depends on how thin your walls are and how close your roommate is,” said Victor.

“True. But his room is on the other side of the kitchen. It’s not that. I don’t know, it’s like headphones instead of playing music through speakers.”

“Ok. Of course we could actually see each other if we did a video call.”  
“True,” said Yuuri, his heart picking up pace. “I...umm...I don’t know about that...tonight.”

“Ok,” said Victor softly. “That’s ok.”

“Sorry. It’s just...easier this way. I think I’d be more nervous if you could see me.”

“I understand, Yuuri. It’s alright.” There was a moment when neither of them spoke. “So are you naked now?”

“Mmm, almost. I’m still in my underwear.”

“What do they look like?” Yuuri thought Victor sounded like he was smiling.

“Just black boxer briefs.”

“That’s what you were wearing the night of the banquet. I remember how you looked in them.”

Yuuri chuckled. “That’s what I’m usually wearing.”

“Will you take them off for me?” Victor could probably talk anyone out of their clothes with a voice like that, Yuuri thought.

“Yes,” he answered. “I will. Just for you.” He thought he heard Victor’s breath catch. Yuuri held the phone with his shoulder while he pulled down his underwear. “Ok.”

“Hmm, and what would I see if I were there, Yuuri?”

Yuuri flinched, embarrassment making his chest tight for a moment. He...didn’t know how to do this. He knew what Victor probably wanted to hear: that he was hard. And it was true, he was. But he couldn’t figure out how to say it. What if that wasn’t what Victor meant? Maybe he should start by describing where he was, his bed, what he looked like? No, that was stupid. The tightness had spread into his throat.

“Maybe I should start,” Victor said and Yuuri almost cried out in relief. “So I’m in my bed, covers pulled down to my knees, and I’m completely naked.” Victor’s voice was soothing, slow and careful. “And I am desperately hard right now, Yuuri, from thinking about you, talking to you, imagining you taking your clothes off for me.”

“Victor,” gasped Yuuri, his hand moving down his body. “Me too. Mmm. I was getting hard before you even called, thinking about you.”

“Really?” Victor sounded pleased. “I thought you were laughing at dogs.”

“I _was._ ” Yuuri insisted. “But I was doing that to try to distract myself so I didn’t get too desperate before you called.”

“God, Yuuri.” Victor hummed. “What were you thinking about? Tell me, please.” His voice had a new urgency in it.

“Victor,” whined Yuuri, his hand moving on his cock.

“Please, krasavchik, I want to hear your voice while I touch myself.”

“Are you?” asked Yuuri, voice hitching a bit.

“Yes,” moaned Victor, and Yuuri’s hand gripped harder. “Are you? Are you touching your pretty cock?” Yuuri moaned at that, his hips lifting.

“Yes, yes. Victor.”

“Tell me what got you so hard earlier,” commanded Victor.

“I was imagining this, us on the phone. I was thinking about you listening to me while I masturbated. Watching me while I did. And it got me hard. And then I almost couldn’t keep from doing it. But I didn’t want you to call...while I was right in the middle.” The words poured out of Yuuri, spilling from his lips to the rhythm of his hand on his dick.

“Fuck,” groaned Victor. “Next time I want to do that. I want to watch you. Just watch while you touch yourself.”

Yuuri whimpered at that. For a little while they both just panted into the phone, making small noises of pleasure. “I love your voice, Victor. Talk to me?”

“I love the way you say my name. It’s got a little Japanese flair to it. God, I wish I was there with you.”

“What would you do?”

“Oh, everything. But you know what I’d really like? I’d like to climb on top of you and ride your thick cock.”

“Ah!” Yuuri cried out, hardly believing Victor’s words. “Really?”

“Yes. I wanted to do that when we were together. I thought about it. I’m sorry we didn’t have time because I’d really like to know what you felt like inside me.”

“Victor,” Yuuri whined. He was imagining it now, Victor straddling him, his body stretched out above him. “Oh, fuck, Victor, I want you.” Victor made a strangled noise and his breathing changed rhythm. He whimpered very close to the phone.

“Fuck,” he gasped. “Fuck.” His breathing was slowing now, while Yuuri’s was still increasing.

“Was that...?” he asked.

“Yeah. Yeah, I came.” Victor sounded dazed and breathless.

“Oh,” Yuuri pictured it, pictured Victor flushed and sweaty, come splattered on his stomach. He made a noise in his throat.  
“Still going, Yuuri?”

“Yeah.”

“Such stamina,” purred Victor. “Let’s see if I can help. Hmm. I want you to come for me, Yuuri. I want you to come screaming my name. Can you do that for me?”

Yuuri panted loudly, edging closer. “Yes.”

“You know what I really want you to do to me, krasavchik? I want you to fuck me hard, pound me into the bed, till I’m a sobbing wreck. I bet you’d like that, wouldn’t you?” Yuuri couldn’t manage a response in words, just made a noise halfway between a moan and growl. “Yeah, I though you might. The way you held me down and climbed on top back in Sochi, god, that turned me on. I almost begged you to fuck me right then. Next time I see you I’m going to bend over the nearest piece of furniture and beg until you shove that cock in me.”

Yuuri sobbed, his orgasm ripping through him. He remembered what Victor had asked. “Victor!” he cried out as he stroked himself through his release. He shuddered hard several times as he came down from the rush, panting heavily into the phone. He could hear Victor breathing, too, but the other man didn’t say anything.

Finally, when his breathing was starting to slow and his body relax, Victor spoke. “I feel so honored to have heard that.” His words brought heat back to Yuuri’s cheeks instantly. He must have made a sound because Victor laughed gently. “Yuuri, I mean it, that was amazing.”

“Vic-torrr.” Yuuri squirmed in retroactive self-consciousness.

“What?” Victor sounded amused.

“Just...I don’t know. You’re so...”

“Wonderful?” suggested Victor in a teasing tone.

“Well, yes,” said Yuuri. “But I meant you keep saying these _things._ ”

“You like it when I do,” said Victor with confidence.

“I...I guess I do,” admitted Yuuri. “But they still make me blush.”

“Oh, good, you’re adorable when you blush.”

“See! You did it again!”

Victor laughed. “So phone sex, everything I said to you, that was fine. But saying you’re adorable bothers you? You’d rather me say how much I want to feel your hard cock in my ass?”

Yuuri sucked in a breath. He laughed shakily. “They...it’s different. They both make me blush, but differently.” He paused, trying to focus through the haze of endorphins and emotions that swirled in his chest. “I do like the way they make me feel, though.”

“Good,” said Victor warmly. Yuuri took a deep breath, trying to steady himself. He reached for his t-shirt, using it to clean himself off enough so he could roll onto his side and stretch.

“That was a lovely start to the day,” said Victor conversationally.

“Start of yours, end of mine. I do feel like I’ll sleep well, though.”

“The time difference makes you feel further away.”

“Yeah. I mean, I _am_ very far away, to be fair.”

“I researched how long the flight was. Fifteen hours?”

“Hmm, probably, if you found a direct one. Usually I end up having to change flights at least once, maybe twice. This time it was just New York. I’ve had to fly Detroit-NewYork New York-London London-Moscow before. It felt like it took about three days.”

“Urgh.” Victor was quiet for a moment. “I researched the cost, too.”

“To come here?” Yuuri wondered if he was missing something.

“Yeah. Just...to see.”

“In the three days since I left, you looked up flights to Detroit?” Yuuri frowned, realizing his voice didn’t sound the way he’d like it to.

“Umm, yes? I...I realize that sounds a little...stalker-ish.” Yuuri laughed. Victor Nikiforov was worried he sounded like an obsessed stalker. Of _him._ Yuuri tried to speak, but kept snickering at the absurdity of the thought. “Yuuri?” Victor sounded concerned.

“Sorry, just, I dunno.” Yuuri waved a hand through the air in front of his face. “No. I was just surprised. I guess it’s not really strange, though.”

“What were you laughing at?”

“Just the thought of you worrying about sounding like a stalker. You, Victor Nikiforov. A stalker. Of me.” Yuuri bit his lip suddenly, remembering that Victor had actually had at least one pretty scary stalker, years ago when he was barely an adult.

“I could stalk you!” Victor insisted as if insulted. “You’re very stalk-able.” Yuuri chuckled, a bit nervously.

“Well,” he said, wanting to change the subject.

“Yeah,” said Victor. “I was thinking about when the next time I’ll get to see you is. Worlds is so far away.”

“I know. Four months.” Yuuri sighed.

“You’ll be in Japan for Nationals at the end of December, but Russian Nationals overlap.”

“Yeah? And then my next event isn’t until February for Four Continents.”

“Europeans is in January. Do you think you could come for those?”

“Uh...I don’t...I mean I wouldn’t have a reason to be there.” Yuuri tried to imagine some excuse to give Celestino for why he needed to fly to Europe that wasn’t so he could get laid.

“Well...”

“I mean, except for seeing you.” Yuuri grinned. “I can’t think that Celestino would be convinced that I really, really need to fly to Europe to watch my competition in public.”

“Hmm, yeah.” Victor sounded disappointed. “Would he let you, though? I mean if you wanted to take a week off and fly over...”

“I don’t know. I’ve never tried to do anything like that. I haven’t even visited my family at home in the last five years, you know.”

“Oh, right. I forgot you told me that.” Yuuri considered how long four months was, and how short at the same time. Four months during the skating season, during the school year would fly by normally. “Are you...close with your family?” asked Victor, the shift in topic jarring Yuuri for a moment.

“My family? Yeah? I mean, not that close, I guess since I live so far away. They don’t really understand skating, so it’s hard to talk to them sometimes. But they try. And they support me, let me leave home to do this...”

“Oh.” There was something strange in Victor’s voice.

“Why?” Yuuri asked.

“Just...I was wondering if you didn’t go home because you didn’t want to see them.”

“Oh! No, no it’s nothing like that. I love my family. I miss them, and I’d like to go home, but...” Yuuri sighed. “Being here is really expensive. They support my skating, but coach’s fees, rink time, my living expenses, school fees, it adds up, and I’ve never gotten enough sponsors and subsidies to really cover everything. So there’s not a lot for extra travel.”

“I see. I didn’t think of that.” No, Victor wouldn’t, Yuuri thought. He certainly didn’t lack for sponsorships or money. Yuuri had never really reached the top level internationally that was needed to start making real money. And living and training away from Japan meant he wasn’t always able to take advantage of opportunities there.

There was a bit of an awkward silence. “I’m not close with my family,” said Victor after a time.

“Oh,” said Yuuri, unsure what else to say. He had wondered about that over the years. Victor never mentioned his family in the press.

“Do you...ever see them?”

Victor’s voice was remote. “No. I talk to them every once in a while. A couple times a year. It’s awkward. That’s it.”

“Oh. I’m sorry.” He couldn’t think of anything else to say.

“It is what it is.” Victor sighed. “I’m sorry to bring the conversation down.”

“No! No, it’s fine.”

“You’re probably needing to go to sleep. And I should get going.”

“Oh crap, it _is_ late.”

“Sleep well, then.”

“Victor,” Yuuri didn’t know what he wanted to say precisely. “I’ll text you later?”

“Yeah, please” Victor said warmly. “Till tomorrow, _krasavchik._ ”


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yuuri wonders about the nature of his new relationship with Victor, they sort some things out.

Days passed and Yuuri settled into his new routine. Training, schoolwork, hanging out with Phichit, and long phone conversations with Victor Nikiforov, who was apparently his boyfriend now.

That had been officially established a few days after Yuuri returned from Sochi. Yuuri was hanging around the rink while Phichit practiced, texting with Victor. And then Victor had sent a message.

 **Victor Nikiforov:** I have to go. I’m having dinner with a friend.

  
**Katsuki Yuuri:** Oh, ok. Have fun!

  
**Victor Nikiforov:** I’ll call you in the morning, if we don’t talk before then!

It wasn’t a big deal. But Yuuri couldn’t help wondering the gender of the friend. And what kind of dinner it was. Was it an expensive, candlelit dinner? Or a couple friends grabbing whatever the Russian equivalent of tacos was? Victor can go to dinner with whoever he wants, he told himself. But he wondered. They hadn’t actually said they were exclusive. Or even dating. And of course Victor would have other people interested in him. He and Yuuri were just getting to know one another. They’d just spent a single night together.

Surely Victor slept with people all the time and didn’t become exclusive with them. There was no reason he _would_ expect exclusivity, right? Yuuri tried very hard not to imagine Victor in bed with someone else at that very moment. Or perhaps not that very moment, but later, after dinner. What if...what if he fell in love with this person? What if Yuuri missed his chance? Should he text Victor while he still had time? And say what...please don’t sleep with them? How pathetic and desperate would that sound? Especially if it wasn’t a date...

Yuuri was incredibly distracted throughout his practice. But he stayed late at the rink and kept skating until he was completely exhausted. It was the only way he knew to quiet his spiraling thoughts. Yuuri rode home exhausted, his mind a dull blur of vague panic. Phichit could tell something was wrong as soon as he walked through the door.

“What’s up?” he asked from his cocoon of blankets on the couch where he was watching some cartoon.

“Umm, Victor might be sleeping with someone else as we speak?”

“What??” Phichit gave him a skeptical look. “What makes you think that?”

Yuuri shrugged sheepishly. “He said he was going to dinner with someone.”

“And from that, you’ve decided he’s cheating on you.” Phichit patted the couch next to him. Yuuri trudged reluctantly towards it.

“He’s not cheating; we never said we were even dating. Or exclusive. That’s why...” He fell onto the couch heavily. “I know it’s probably crazy. But...I can’t stop thinking about it. And it’s _not_ crazy because he’s Victor Nikiforov and he probably has to make an effort _not_ to get laid.”

Phichit leaned against Yuuri’s shoulder. “Yuuri, what did he say exactly?”

“Umm, he said he was going to dinner with a friend?”

“A friend.” Phichit gave him a look.

“Yeah. That could mean a lot of things!” he said defensively.

“So if you said you were going to dinner with me, would Victor have anything to worry about?”

“No, because I would say I was going with Phichit, and he already knows we’re just friends.”

“You talked about us?” Yuuri frowned at his friend. He didn’t seem to get the central point.

“Yeah, of course. I mean, he asked who you were and if he should be jealous. He was joking, mostly,” Yuuri explained.

“So he said he’d be jealous if you were involved with someone else. And you think you haven’t talked about seeing other people. Yuuri, you’re impossible.” Phichit was grinning.

“I know, I know. Ok, you’re right.” He thought about it. He already felt loads better, which was always the case from talking with Phichit. “You’re right. It was implied, right? That he’d be jealous. So that means he’d probably know I’d feel jealous, too, right?”

“Probably. And from what you say about how nice he is, it seems like he would at least ask you first.”

Yuuri took a deep breath. “Thanks, Phichit.”

“That’s what I’m here for,” said his friend. “Wanna watch Steven Universe with me?”

“Nah, I need a shower.” He stood up from the couch.

“You do kinda stink. Wasn’t gonna mention it.”

“You’re a true friend.” Yuuri made his way to the bathroom on aching feet. He had pushed himself a little too hard that day and he had several extra painful spots on his feet. He was tending to his feet later that night when his phone rang.

“Hi! Ow.”

Victor’s stumbled over his greeting. “Are you ok?” he asked.

“Oh, yeah, I’m just trying to take care of my feet. I have a couple blisters that need to be popped.”

“Oh. Did you overdo it today?”

“Mmm, maybe a little. I stayed late.” Yuuri abandoned his prodding of his feet and lay back in bed.

“Yuuri, you know you have to take care of yourself. The last thing you need is an injury right now.” Yuuri boggled a little at Victor’s chiding tone.

“Okay, _coach_ ,” he muttered. “And I’m sure you never skate more than you’re supposed to.”

“Well, alright, you have a point. I’m terrible about that.” Yuuri chuckled.

“Really, I’m used to it. I used to skate so much more back in Japan. The rink in my hometown, they gave me a key so I could go over there any time. Skating helps me...calm down.”

“Hmm, that sounds nice, free access to a rink. By yourself? I mean, I love my teammates, but, sometimes...”

“Yeah.” Yuuri thought in the pause in conversation.

“Victor?” he asked, tentative.

“Yes?” Victor was smiling, Yuuri could tell it in his voice now.

“What _are_ we exactly?” Yuuri winced in the silence that followed.

“Mmm, the two sexiest skaters on the international circuit?”

Yuuri laughed despite his mood. “Don’t tell that to Christophe!”

“You’re way, way sexier than Chris, Yuuri. Trust me.” Yuuri smirked.

“Oh, I know. I meant me and Chris. We’re obviously the top two sexiest skaters.” He grinned in anticipation of Victor’s reaction.

“Yuuri!” Victor gasped. “I’m wounded. But fine, if that’s how you feel I won’t stand in your way. I’ll call Chris and give him the good news. Maybe I can find solace in the arms of his jilted boyfriend.”

“Victor,” he said, chiding. “You know, I never had a poster of Christophe Giacometti on my wall.”

“Wait. Does that mean you _did_ have a poster of _me_?” Victor sounded thrilled. Yuuri laughed nervously, glancing to Victor’s face staring back at him from five different posters.

“Posters,” he corrected. “Plural.”

“Oh my god, Yuuri! That’s amazing!” Yuuri wasn’t going to tell Victor exactly how many posters it had been or that some had come with him to Detroit. “I need a poster of you! Are there posters of you?”

“Uh, I have no idea. In Japan? Probably.” Yuuri suddenly had a strange feeling of his world shifting slightly. There probably were posters of him, and it was entirely possible that some young skater had him on the wall of their room. Did they...oh no, he couldn’t think about this.

“You didn’t answer my question,” he said instead.

“What question?” Victor was easily distracted in conversation, that was something else Yuuri had learned.

“What are we?” Yuuri’s face heated. “I mean...you know...are we...dating?”

Victor laughed a little. “I hope so? I don’t usually have phone sex with people I’m just friends with.”

Yuuri laughed in relief. “Yeah, you have a point.” He hesitated. “So, is that...official then?”

“Official? Do you want people to know?”

“No, I didn’t mean public. Just...officially...for us.”

“Oh. Well, yes.” Victor still sounded a little confused. “Officially a couple?”

“Are you asking?”

“I guess?” Victor replied. Yuuri chuckled nervously. This was ridiculous.

“I’d like that,” he said. “So...does that make you...my boyfriend?”

“Yes,” said Victor, decisively. Yuuri beamed, closing his eyes for a moment. “Is that what you want?” Victor continued when Yuuri didn’t speak.

“Yes. Yes. Definitely.”

It was another few days before they discussed past relationships. Victor was dismissive of his romantic history, claiming he’d never really been in a serious relationship.

“Really? Never?” Yuuri was skeptical.

“Well, when I was younger, I thought a couple were serious. But I was naive. I got my heart broken.” Victor’s tone was casual.

“Oh. I’m sorry.”

“Well, it was a long time ago. I...in retrospect I did a terrible job of choosing who to fall for.”

“Hmm, yeah.” Yuuri was intensely curious about who Victor had fallen for and what had happened. He wanted to track the person down and yell at them for not appreciating what they’d had. But he could hear the reluctance in Victor’s voice, so he didn’t push.

“How about you? Any terrible crushes on inappropriate targets?” asked Victor.

Yuuri flushed. _Just you,_ he thought but didn’t say. “Umm, not really. Unless you count my friend Yuuko. She was a few years older and took me under her wing when I started skating. I kissed her once. But that was before I realized I wasn’t really interested in girls. And then she started dating the guy she’s married to now, so… My dating history isn’t that interesting.”

“No, no, I’m very interested,” insisted Victor. “When did you figure out you liked boys?”

“Oh, umm...” Yuuri’s face heated further. “It was, umm...”

“What? Is it really embarrassing? How about I’ll tell you mine?” suggested Victor. “I was at a competition, when I was still a junior. It was one of my first big events. There was this pair team on the ice and all the young male skaters were in love with the girl. So we were all gathered to watch them skate and all my friends were ogling at her, and I couldn’t take my eyes off her partner. I remember being fascinated by his strength, the way he lifted her. I started thinking about doing pairs, and wishing I could find a strong man to lift me like that. I was still pretty small then, you know, so I didn’t see why I couldn’t do what she did. I even told people about it, until someone finally explained I couldn’t. So, anyway, that was the start.” Victor sounded suddenly shy.

“That’s a great story,” said Yuuri fondly.

“I felt like an idiot about it at the time,” admitted Victor.

“No, it’s...sweet. I would have loved to see you skate pairs when you were young.” Yuuri imagined it, Victor with his long hair lifted into the air, being thrown into spectacular jumps.

“But not now?” Victor asked.

“Well, I’ll admit you’re probably too big to be lifted overhead or thrown now. Maybe you could be an ice dancer!” Victor chuckled.

“Thank you for indulging me,” he said with a mock serious tone. “So are you going to tell me about your gay awakening?”

“Well,” Yuuri still hesitated. “It was also skating related.” He took a deep breath. “It was you, actually.”

“Me?” Victor’s voice was soft. “Really?”

“Yeah. I would watch you in competition on this little old TV at the ice rink with Yuuko. I remember the first time I saw you skate, it was when you won Junior Worlds, in the costume with the black mesh and the crystals. You made a huge impression on me. Your skating, too, I mean, but also I just thought you were so beautiful.”

“Wow.”

“Umm, yeah. I didn’t really realize then, but I’ll never forget it. It was your Rusalka program, like I told you before. That was when I really _realized_ what I felt when I watched you. That was a very sexy program.” Yuuri held his breath waiting for Victor reaction.

“Wow,” he repeated. “Yuuri, that’s amazing. I’m honored. I didn’t know you were such a fan.”

“Well, I mean, of course I was. You were taking the skating world by storm when I was growing up. I desperately wanted to be able to skate like you.” Yuuri sighed, deciding he might as well continue now he’d admitted so much. “And I thought maybe if I got really good I’d get to meet you one day. Skate against you.”

“Huh. So when you asked me to dance at that banquet, you were fulfilling a childhood fantasy?” Victor didn’t sound upset by the idea.

“Sort of. I mean, I was drunk, and you were being nice to me, so...yeah. I completely blew the skating part of my dream, so I guess I figured I didn’t have a lot to lose. But really I wasn’t thinking much at all.” Yuuri winced. “I mean, I never really thought...this would happen. Or the night in Sochi would happen. I didn’t, like, have a plan to seduce you or anything.”

Victor laughed. “You managed it anyway, though. I never would have guessed. I thought you were completely uninterested in me at first.”

“I...I was nervous. I didn’t think...I didn’t think I _deserved_ to be noticed by you, after bombing like that on the ice.”

“Yuuri,” chided Victor. “Did you really think I was so shallow? That I’m only interested in people who win?”

“No, no. It wasn’t that. I mean, well, I don’t know. I didn’t know you then. I just...didn’t think a lot of myself at that moment.” There was an awkward pause.

“How about now?” asked Victor, voice soft. “Do you feel better about yourself now?”

“Umm,” answered Yuuri. “Yes? A bit. I was ready to quit after the final. I just wanted to never experience that again. But now, I’m...determined.”

“Good. You definitely shouldn’t quit. You...you’ve got great potential, Yuuri. I can see it in your programs. Sometimes you’re so good it’s breathtaking. You just need to pull it all together and skate with more confidence.”

“You...” Yuuri’s chest was tight. “You’ve watched my programs?”

“Of course. I know you didn’t want me to see them when we were together, but I couldn’t resist. I think I’ve watched everything there is of you on YouTube.”

“Really?” Yuuri squeaked. He didn’t really know what all was up there, since he could never bring himself to watch his performances unless Celestino forced him.

“Yes, and I mean it. You’ve got a lot of skill. I like your programs from this year.”

“Really? I’m not sure I do anymore,” Yuuri said with a twist of his mouth.

“Hmm, yeah I think we all get to that point in the season where we just hate what we’re skating. I was at that place with Stammi Vicino.”

“You were? You’re not now?” asked Yuuri.

“Yeah. I wasn’t connecting with it properly at the GPF. But in practice the last couple of days, I think I’ve found my way in.” Victor sounded happy.

“I can’t believe you can win GPF gold and say you’re not happy with your performance. Oh, wait, yes I can. You’re Victor Nikiforov. I forgot.” Yuuri was teasing a bit. He knew Victor was a perfectionist, that’s why he was so much better than everyone in the field.

“Well,” said Victor. “Anyway, how has your training been coming since the final?”

“Not bad actually. Like I said, I’m determined. My coach calls me stubborn. There’s still something a little off in my free. I feel like the jumps aren’t coming at the right time, or maybe they’re in the wrong order.”

“You should put more jumps in the second half. Or harder jumps. You don’t look too tired in the videos I’ve seen.”

“Hmm. Yeah, everyone says I have good stamina. It comes from skating so much of the time when I was younger, I guess. They let me into the rink whenever I wanted back at home.”

“Nice. I’d take advantage of that to get the extra points. And also to impress the judges. Maybe you’d feel more confident if your hardest jumps weren’t first and you got more into the flow.”

“That’s...actually a really good idea, Victor. Thank you.” Yuuri grinned widely. He couldn’t believe he was this lucky.

“No problem.”

“What if I take your advice and then kick your ass at Worlds, though,” Yuuri joked. Victor laughed.

“I’d be thrilled, _krasavchik,_ ” he said, his voice warm.

“No you wouldn’t. You like winning,” replied Yuuri quickly.

“No, not really. I’d be very happy if you won instead, I promise you.” The smile faded from Yuuri’s face. He didn’t like the sadness in Victor’s voice.

“Well that’s not going to happen, at any rate,” he said, feeling uncomfortable with the whole topic.

“Maybe not. Don’t sell yourself short, though,” said Victor. “I think if you had the right program, on the right day, you could beat me.” Yuuri had no idea what to say to that.

~~~~~

Yuuri considered Victor’s words as he continued his training and work on his free program. Finally he brought up the idea of moving his jumps around to Celestino, who was skeptical. Yuuri persisted, however, and they finally agreed to try moving one of his quad toe combinations later in the program and placing an easier jump in the first pass. Yuuri was pleased with how the new order felt.

He started considering his quad loop as well. It was a jump they’d worked on in the summer, but Yuuri had never been able to land it consistently. So they’d left it out of his programs. The next week Yuuri asked Celestino if they could work on the quad loop some more, in case he ended up needing it to win. Celestino was concerned about Yuuri’s uncharacteristic assertiveness, afraid he was putting too much pressure on himself. Yuuri convinced him the GPF had been a wake-up call, and he wanted to have a good Worlds, since he didn’t know how much longer he’d be able to skate.

He didn’t tell Victor about the quad loop, but he did tell him he’d taken his suggestion about pushing the harder jumps later. He could hear how pleased Victor was in his voice. At the mention of their earlier conversation, Victor commented, “You know you never did get around to telling me about your past relationships.”

“Oh?” Yuuri tried to play casual, as if he had simply forgotten and not intentionally redirected the conversation. “You weren’t exactly detailed either,” he pointed out.

“Well, I don’t so much have past relationships as past...partners,” Victor admitted. “I gave up on relationships when I was a teenager and just focused on skating. And sex, when I had the chance.”

“I’m going to guess that was fairly often?” Yuuri imagined Victor beating potential lovers off with a stick.

“Mmm, it depends on your basis for comparison. Compared to Chris? No.” Yuuri laughed.

“Yes, well, I have an idea how little that says.” Yuuri considered. “You know a lot of people talk about you two.”

“Do they? Still?” Victor was amused.

“A little. Not as much as a few years ago, I guess. Was there any...basis for the rumors?”

“Besides the fact that we’re friends?” Victor sighed. “Yeah, I guess there was. I mean, we...we never dated or anything. We were always just friends. But occasionally...”

“You were fuck buddies,” finished Yuuri.

“Yeah, I guess. Is that the term?”

“Or friends with benefits, if you prefer. That’s what they say here, at least.”

“I’ll have to remember to ask you if I find any American idioms I don’t understand.” Victor paused. “You don’t mind, about Chris?”

“Oh, no. I just wondered if there was anything...you know, unresolved between you.”

“No, nothing like that. He’s got this new boyfriend-type-person and I have you.” Yuuri smiled. “I’m getting the feeling you’re dodging my question,” he added.

“No. Ok, not much,” Yuuri admitted. “Really, I guess it’s about the same? I’ve never really...had a serious relationship? I’ve gone on a few dates, had a few, umm, random hookups, but I was always so busy. No one I met really understood skating and what my life involved. And I guess I never really...fell for anyone.” He left off the next word: ‘before’

“Me either...before now,” said Victor, and Yuuri melted.

“Yeah,” he said softly. “Before now.” They shared a moment of silence.

“But what you’re telling me is, shy Katsuki Yuuri, mystery of the international skating scene, is a heartless playboy breaking hearts by seducing the beautiful men of Detroit and leaving them in the morning?”

“What?! No,” Yuuri insisted. “And you’re one to talk! I’m pretty sure the words ‘beautiful Russian skating playboy’ are written a couple times a week about you!”

“Yuuri, are you reading all my press? I’m flattered.”

Yuuri rolled his eyes “That’s _not_ a denial,” he pointed out. “And no, I’m not a playboy, and there aren’t any broken hearts. I’m pretty sure American frat boys don’t get broken hearts about the drunken blow job they got at a party the night before.”

“Yuuri! Is that your type? Drunk frat boys? I’ve seen enough American movies to know those guys are bad news.” Victor sounded offended.

Yuuri laughed. “Hmm, well, ok, but he was seriously hot, though. And there was just one frat boy. Oh, wait, two to three...three frat boys.” Victor’s laughter rang out. “You can blame Phichit. He’s always the one dragging me to those parties. He plies me with drinks and then calls me a slutty drunk the next day. It’s not fair.”

“Mmm, maybe not,” said Victor. “But I might have to agree with him after seeing you at the banquet. That is _not_ a complaint, by the way.”

“When I’m a little drunk I just don’t get as nervous about things,” Yuuri explained. “But, yeah, almost all my experience has been one night stands.”

“I guess technically _this_ counts as a one-night stand,” Victor pointed out.

“Technically, maybe. But...it’s different.”

“Yeah, it is. Very different,” Victor agreed.

“Can I tell you something?” Yuuri asked, trying to steel himself.

“Sure,” Victor said, a bit quietly.

“I...umm, before that night, with you, I’d never actually...uh...been fucked.” Yuuri buried his face in his pillow.

“Oh. Really?” Victor sounded surprised and a little concerned.

Yuuri turned his face enough to speak into the phone. “Yeah?”

“You...you should have said something,” said Victor.

“I know. But, well, I just...wanted it. And didn’t want to make a big deal out of it.” He lifted his eyes to the ceiling, waiting for Victor’s reaction.

“Was it...ok?” Victor asked, worried.

“Yes! Of course. It was _great._ So great, Victor, really.” Yuuri smiled at the thought that Victor was worried about him.

“Well, good,” said Victor, still sounding unsure. “I’m glad you trusted me.”

“I did,” said Yuuri. “You know it’s strange, but...it wasn’t the kind of thing I ever felt right doing...with someone I was only with for one night. But with you...it was different. Even though at the time I didn’t imagine this would turn into anything but one night together.”

“I did,” said Victor, to Yuuri’s surprise. “There was something about you...I knew almost immediately that I wanted more than just sex from you.”

“Really?”

“Mmm-hmm. I remember thinking that I wanted to spend the night with you, but mostly I wanted it to be so good that you’d remember me and I’d get more than a single night with you.” Yuuri blinked, feeling choked up.

“Well,” he said, clearing his throat. “Mission accomplished.”

“I’m still waiting on a second night,” pointed out Victor.

“True,” said Yuuri with longing.

“I’m not waiting for Worlds,” said Victor. “Seriously, we’re going to work something out. I’d get on a plane tomorrow if I didn’t think Yakov might actually kill me. And even then I still might if I wouldn’t worry about messing you up for Nationals.” Yuuri smiled.

“Yeah, I...don’t actually think that’s a good idea. Much as I’d like to see you. Maybe...after Nationals?” he suggested hesitantly. It felt so strange to consider. Victor Nikiforov flying to Detroit to see him? Him asking someone, anyone, to spend money and fly around the world for him? But he wanted it so desperately that he was willing to sound like a fool for asking.

“Yeah,” said Victor softly. “Sounds good to me.”

~~~~~

“Victor might visit after Nationals,” Yuuri told Phichit the next day during lunch.

“Really? Here?” Phichit looked surprised.

“Yeah? I mean, maybe,” Yuuri hedged. “We talked about it a little.”

“Yuuri with the international booty call!” said Phichit, making Yuuri blush and glare at him. “Couldn’t he just go to Japan to cheer you on for Nationals?”

Yuuri shook his head. “Russian Nationals are at the same time. Or almost, I think.” Phichit was already tapping on his phone to check.

“Hmm, yeah they overlap. Russian Nationals end first, two days before the Japanese. Technically, he could still come see you,” Phichit pointed out.

“Fly all that way for, like, a day?” He shook his head. “What’s your deal anyway, you don’t want Victor coming here?”

“No, no, I definitely would like to have him visit. I could tell him all the embarrassing things I know about you, like how you have multiple copies of your favorite posters of him, and how you had your first orgasm thinking about him.”

“What!! How do you…?” Yuuri’s face burned.

“You told me one night when we were drunk,” said Phichit, laughing. Yuuri whacked at his shoulder.

“Don’t you _dare_ Phichit! Seriously! I’ll...I’ll...I don’t know what I’ll do, but I’ll think of something.” Phichit just giggled delightedly.

“Well, I guess you’d have to decide whether you’re so desperate for his dick that you’re willing to risk it or not,” he said.

“Ugh, I hate you,” grumbled Yuuri. He was that desperate for it, and Phichit knew it.

“Yeah, I know,” agreed Phichit happily. “I have to get some fun out of it, though, if you’re going to make me listen to the two of you getting it on through the wall the whole time.”

“Our rooms don’t even share a wall,” protested Yuuri.

“Why do I think that’s not going to be enough to protect my innocent ears?”

“Innocent, right,” huffed Yuuri.

Later that evening he blamed Phichit for putting the idea into his head of having Victor there, in his bed. He kept getting distracted all night, imagining where and how they would do it, how many times. He looked at the clock, wondering if he should jerk off and get it out of his system or wait for Victor’s call and do it then. The thought of Victor’s voice made his cock ache, but made him want to wait.

By the time his phone finally rang he was ridiculously keyed up. Victor started chatting casually, like they had every other night, and Yuuri couldn’t help stroking himself through his pants.

“Yuuri?” asked Victor after a moment.

“Yeah?” he replied, stilling his hand.

“Everything ok? You seem quiet.”

“Oh, umm...actually, I’m really...horny.” He winced, waiting for Victor’s reply.

“Ohhh,” said Victor, sounding pleased. “I see. So...what’s got you worked up?”

“Mmm, I was thinking about you,” he admitted. “You coming to visit. What I’d like to do.”

“Did you touch yourself while you were thinking about me?” Victor’ voice was breathier now.

“No. I am now, though.” Yuuri’s face and neck were burning, but he kept stroking himself.

“Mmm, God, Yuuri, you’re so hot.” He heard Victor shifting, the rustle of clothing.

“Are you hard?” Yuuri asked, part of him marveling at his nerve. Yuuri from two months ago wouldn’t believe this.

“Yeah, getting there fast,” said Victor. “Yuuri, remember we talked about Skype? I want to see you.”

Yuuri stilled, mind racing. He looked down at himself, dirty t-shirt pushed up his stomach, worn sweats pushed down. Then he flicked his eyes up to his walls, to his posters. Shit.

“It’s ok if you don’t want to,” said Victor when he didn’t reply.

“No, I...I want to,” he said, the thought of being able to see Victor, Victor touching himself, overruling his own self-consciousness. “But you have to give me a minute. I’d rather use my laptop and I need to set it up.”

“Oh, yeah, good idea,” agreed Victor. “Easier than a phone you’re trying to hold. I guess I should go get my Macbook.” He heard Victor getting up and walking around. He stood up, pulling his pants back up. He went to his desk where his laptop was open already. He turned, trying to gauge how much of the room would show from the webcam. He decided to take down all the posters on the far wall, just to be safe. He took the first one down carefully, but trying to stretch for the second, higher on the wall, without putting down the phone was more difficult.

“Hey Victor, lemme get off the phone and I’ll text you when I’m ready, ok?”

“Ok, sounds good.”

Yuuri quickly took down the rest of the posters, setting them on his dresser carefully. He looked down at his clothes again. Maybe he could just take them off? But then he’d be answering the phone naked and that seemed a little presumptuous, even if they clearly intended to watch each other jerk off. Holy crap, he was going to watch Victor Nikiforov jerk off! _Focus,_ Yuuri chided himself.

He stripped off his shirt and sweats, pulling out a pair of black track pants and pulling them on. He seriously considered leaving his shirt off, but it was a little cold so he pulled a plain white shirt out of the drawer and pulled it on. He ran a hand through his hair which was still damp from his earlier shower. Nothing he could really do there, unless he wanted to go to the bathroom and apply gel, which was surely silly. He could take his glasses off, but he wanted to be able see, so...yeah. He picked up his phone and sat at his desk, his stomach turning over nervously. He texted Victor, “Ok, ready,” along with his Skype number.

Finally a notification popped up on his desktop and he answered it. The video feed loaded, showing him Victor’s head and shoulders. He was beaming, his mouth curving up into a heart shape.

“Hi, Yuuri!” he said, waving adorably. Yuuri couldn’t have stopped smiling back at him for the world.

“Hi, Victor!” he returned, feeling a bit silly. He also noticed Victor wasn’t wearing a shirt, his shoulders bare. Naturally he hadn’t felt self-conscious about it. Yuuri wondered if Victor was completely naked. He swallowed.

“It’s so good to see you,” continued Victor brightly. “I missed your face.” Yuuri felt his cheeks heat. “Stalking Instagram just isn’t the same.” Yuuri couldn’t stop grinning fondly at him.

“So I guess I haven’t been hallucinating this whole time, then,” he said, Victor’s image making this whole thing seem real in a way it hadn’t in a while.

“No, I’m really almost positive I’m not a hallucination.”

“Well, if you are, you’re a really, really nice one,” said Yuuri, marveling all over again at Victor’s beauty. His apartment was bright with morning light, Victor sitting on what looked like a sofa, a lovely blue that went nicely with his eyes. Behind him Yuuri could see what looked like part of a kitchen or a dining room, a tall counter with a mug and some books stacked up.

“You look lovely, Yuuri,” said Victor, making Yuuri close his eyes for a moment bashfully. “It’s dark there, I can’t see if you’re blushing.”

“Oh, is it too dark?” he asked. “Hold on.” He stood up to turn on the floor lamp by the head of his bed. “Is that better?” he asked when he sat back in front of the camera. He gasped, then, because Victor had re-positioned his computer and suddenly Yuuri had a full view of him, from the knees up. He was wearing track pants similar to Yuuri’s but his torso was bare. Yuuri had forgotten just how gorgeous his body was. He obviously hadn’t spent enough time staring at it, or kissing it, or licking every inch of it during their night together.

Victor’s hand was in his lap, and he was stroking an obvious bulge in his pants. Yuuri couldn’t do anything but stare, his desire was so strong. He violently wished for the power to teleport, to dive through his screen and taste the man’s skin.

“Yuuri?” asked Victor in a low voice. Yuuri blinked.

“Sorry, I...forgot how hot you were,” he said, face on fire. Victor smiled.

“Thank you. Will you take off your shirt so I can see you?” he asked gently. Yuuri nodded, pulling his shirt over his head. He sat back, checking how much of him was shown on screen. He moved the laptop back as far as it would go, which showed him waist-up.

“Mmm, so lovely,” said Victor. Yuuri fidgeted uncomfortably. Victor was still stroking his erection through his pants, and Yuuri ached at the sight. He couldn’t find any words, so instead he pushed his chair back until he could see enough of himself on the screen.

He stood, checking that the camera could see what he wanted it too, and then he slowly eased his pants down, watching Victor’s reaction as his rigid cock was revealed. Victor’s mouth fell open and he groaned in a way that made Yuuri clench his jaw. Yuuri let his pants drop and sat back in the chair, knees open, his hand going to his cock and stroking up it, once, hard. He let his head fall back because it felt so good.

“Fuck, Yuuri,” said Victor with a nervous laugh. “You’re so fucking hot, I can’t stand it.” Yuuri smiled at him, stroking himself again. Victor was already pushing his own pants down, hand reaching to grip himself before Yuuri could even see his cock.

“That’s it, let me see you,” said Yuuri breathily. He felt a strange, sultry confidence overtake him. It was something like being drunk, something like performing on the ice, when the nerves left him and all there was left was the movement of his body and the sound of his blades carving through the ice.

Victor’s erection came into view, finally, and Yuuri sighed a bit. They both watched each other intently, stroking themselves. Yuuri hadn’t really looked at Victor’s cock before. He’d been too busy sucking it, feeling it under and in him. It was really lovely, one of the prettiest cocks he thought he’d ever seen. Not monstrously huge, not out of proportion to Victor’s body, just lovely, with a slight curve to one side and up. He wanted to feel it in him again so badly.

“I can’t wait to get your cock in me again,” he said. Victor’s eyebrows rose and he moaned, fisting harder at his erection.

“Yuuri,” he moaned. “God yes, I want you.” Yuuri licked his palm and pumped his cock faster, not sure if he should be trying to make this last, but knowing he didn’t have the patience for that. “And I want you to fuck me,” continued Victor. “I want that thick, beautiful cock of yours. I bet it feels amazing.”

“Mmm,” said Yuuri, spreading his legs wider. “Victor. Victor, I’m getting close.”

“Do it, come for me, darling, _krasavchik,_ come on,” moaned Victor, working himself furiously. Yuuri gasped, pulling hard at himself, and then he cried out, shooting thickly onto his belly in several spurts as he stroked himself through.

“Fuck, fuck,” he whispered, eyes still glued to Victor’s image.

“Yuuri,” said Victor, his face red and muscles straining.

“Victor,” he said, “come on, darling, I want to watch you come, want to see your pretty cock come for me.” Victor gave a strangled groan and his hips lifted up as his hand jerked strings of come out of his cock, his orgasm almost as beautiful as him. He looked so desperate and strained as he came, his expression near pain. Yuuri was spellbound.

Only when Victor relaxed back into the couch, gasping for air and letting his hand fall from his dick did Yuuri reach for the box of tissues he kept on his desk. He cleaned the cooling semen from his belly and cock hurriedly.

Victor just lay back on the couch as if exhausted, legs fallen open wide, arms spread to either side. Yuuri smiled. He shifted in the hard chair.

“Victor, I’m going to move to the bed, ok?” he said, sitting forward to unplug his laptop.

“As long as you take me with you,” called Victor. Yuuri laughed. He carried the open laptop in front of him to his narrow bed, sitting it near the foot as he laid down and moved over, then pulling it up so the camera showed his face and chest as he lay on his side.

“I wish I could have you here in bed with me,” he said sadly. He wanted nothing more than to feel Victor’s arms around him.

“Yes,” agreed Victor, who still hadn’t moved. “But then you wouldn’t get any sleep because I’d keep you up all night making you come again and again.”

“Oh, no, not that,” said Yuuri, weakly. Victor finally sat forward, reaching for something on the floor and then using it to scrub at his stomach and genitals. He tossed the item back to the floor and flopped back.

“Was that your shirt?” asked Yuuri, faintly horrified.

Victor chuckled. “No, my underwear.”

“Oh. Slightly less gross,” he admitted.

“Slightly.” Yuuri was enjoying looking at Victor’s naked body, studying his inner thighs, the folds of his stomach, his neck.

“This was a good idea,” he said. Victor smiled.

“I do have good ideas,” he agreed. “I’m glad you appreciate them. So few people do. Next time, I want to...would you let me...tell you want to do? How to touch yourself? Take our time more?”

“Mmm, yeah,” said Yuuri. That sounded incredible. He felt himself relaxing, starting to drift off.

“Are you tired?”

“Yeah...I mean after that...I feel sleepy. But don’t go yet,” he added. “Talk to me.”

“Okay. Wait, though.” Victor leaned forward and the camera moved. When it settled, it was a different view. It looked like Victor was stretched out on the couch with the laptop perched on his stomach. “There, that’s better.”

“Hmm, not sure, I was kinda enjoying the view,” said Yuuri slyly.

Victor pouted. “You moved first. Anyway, how was your day?”

Yuuri smiled. “Fine. The usual. Oh, if you do come visit, you have to completely ignore anything Phichit tells you.”

“Why’s that?” asked Victor with a laugh.

“Because he’s a big liar. Who is definitely not threatening to tell you embarrassing stories if you visit.”

“Embarrassing, eh? What kind of embarrassing?”

“The kind that are gigantic lies,” insisted Yuuri.

“I’ll keep that in mind,” promised Victor. Yuuri didn’t believe him.

“I wish Russian Nationals weren’t at the same time as Japanese and you could come see me in Japan. That would solve _that_ problem,” he grumbled.

“Is it a problem? I mean, does he not like me or something?”

“No, no, I think he’s thrilled, actually. He’s just a highly embarrassing best friend.”

“You’ve met Chris, right?” Victor was smiling. “I would love to go to Japan and see you skate. I could, technically, if I left right after I was done skating.”

“Even then you’d probably only get there in time for the exhibition.”

“Yeah.” Victor looked thoughtful. “Are you going to visit your family while you’re there? They’ll be there for the event, right?”

“Umm, some of them will maybe. Usually not everyone, because they have a business to run. The onsen is busy in winter. But no, I’m not going all the way to Hasetsu. Nationals are in Sapporo this year and that’s the other side of Japan from home.”

“Oh. Because if you were staying in Japan for a while, then I thought maybe it would be worth it to fly in and see you,” said Victor. “I mean, it would be worth it anyway, but you know what I mean.”

“No, I know. I mean, the flight is almost twice as long to come here as it would be to go to Japan...” Yuuri frowned. “I guess, really, since I’m going to be there, it would really make more sense for me to visit you.”

“Oh. Well, maybe,” agreed Victor. “I love Japan, though, I’d love to come visit. And you...I mean, well, I was thinking you could spend time with your family. You said you miss them, and your home...I guess...It’s not really my business though...” He looked away from the camera before turning back with a smile. A smile that didn’t look entirely real to Yuuri.

“I...I don’t know, Victor. It’s not a bad idea, I just...you know I want to see you, and I want to see my family...” Yuuri frowned, considering it. The thought of visiting home, of seeing his entire family and Hasetsu...it opened up an almost painful longing in him. Maybe the reason he never let himself think about going home was because he was afraid if he did, he wouldn’t want to ever leave. And the thought of Victor being there _with_ him. It was strange. Very strange. Where would they stay? In his tiny bedroom at home? Having sex in his bed, with all of his Victor posters still on the walls? It was absurd.

“It’s alright. We’ll figure something out,” said Victor. “Just tell me where you want me to meet you, and I’ll show up.” Yuuri looked at him through the computer screen, feeling for a moment as if their eyes met, even if they didn’t really. Yuuri was suddenly aware of how vulnerable Victor could be, how unlike the image Yuuri had always had of him. It made him flash back to the way Victor had held him during their night together. They way he’d kissed him goodbye the next morning.

Yuuri didn’t think he could date Victor Nikiforov, celebrity playboy and Four Time Figure Skating World Champion. But he was dating this amazingly gentle and kind man he’d met in Sochi, who looked remarkably similar to the guy Yuuri’d had a crush on for most of his life.

“Victor,” he said, realizing he’d been quiet for a long time and Victor was watching him carefully. “I...I think I’d really like to show you my home. If it worked out, I mean.”

Victor’s face broke into a smile and his eyes lit. He was so incredibly beautiful, especially when he was happy. Yuuri wondered if it was as rare as it seemed for Victor to be truly happy. “I’d love that, Yuuri,” he said sincerely. Yuuri grinned back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Communication! I'm such a sucker for it. 
> 
> Of course you have to wonder how Yuuri's going to feel tomorrow about inviting Victor to come to Hasetsu with him...
> 
> Does this mean this story will take us to Japan? Well, yes, but Hasetsu will be the next story in the series. This one is running through the end of Japanese Nationals. Chapter 3 is written, which by my weird logic means I can post this chapter. How quickly I get Ch 3 up depends on what kind of progress I make with Ch 4. 
> 
> Let me know what you think!


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yuuri deals with Nationals, his relationship with Victor, and the anxiety caused by both.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You guys. I have spent so long looking up figure skating event schedules and travel times and time zones and DAMN. So, I am assuming this fic takes place in December of 2015, and that the events of the show cover the 2016-17 season (based on the assumption that the movie will have something to do with the Olympics.)
> 
> I have VERY SLIGHTLY fudged the schedule of the Russian National Championships by placing the exhibition and banquet on the evening of the last day of competition rather than the next day. Whether it is realistic to imagine Victor skates, goes to the banquet, and gets on a plane the same night...I leave to your judgement, but WHATEVER.

“What was I thinking?” moaned Yuuri to Phichit the next day. “Why would Victor want to come to Hasetsu of _all_ places? Yes, just in case you haven’t gotten tired of me, here’s my crappy town and my crazy family.”

“Yuuri,” chided Phichit. “I thought you loved your family _and_ your home. Don’t you miss it?”

“I don’t know, yes? Sometimes? But he’s Victor Nikiforov, he could go anywhere. Hasetsu is _boring_ with an ugly beach and a run down ice rink and my parents run the only onsen still open!” Yuuri curled tighter around the couch cushion he was clutching to his chest. “I could have told him to meet me anywhere! I mean...Tokyo! I don’t really like it much, but it’s much more his style, right?”

“So why did you tell him you wanted him to come home with you?” asked Phichit, as if they were having a conversation that was at all rational.

“It was his idea!” he protested. “Ok...I...it seemed like it might be nice last night. Like...maybe he’d find it charming. And I _would_ like to visit.” The truth was that when they talked Yuuri felt like he and Victor were really close, knew each other so well. Victor was so gentle and sweet on the phone, Yuuri forgot everything else. He forgot they’d spent less than twelve hours in each other’s presence, forgot that he was Victor Nikiforov, the Living Legend.

“It _has_ to be too soon to take him home to meet my parents, right?” he asked desperately.

Phichit shrugged. “Depends if you’ve asked him to marry you yet or not.” Yuuri buried his face in his hands and groaned. “Yuuri, what do you want? Do you want to see Victor or not?”

“Of course I do.”

“Do you want to visit your family?” Yuuri nodded reluctantly, seeing where this was going.

“Well, you know Celestino isn’t going to let you take off more than a week or so in the middle of the season. So why not do both at once? What’s the worst that can happen?”

“Don’t even ask me that Phichit, you should know better,” said Yuuri glumly.

“No, really.”

“I could bomb Nationals, make a fool out of myself in front of Victor, he sees all the posters of him in my childhood bedroom and runs away screaming. Just for one potential scenario of disaster. I could probably come up with 20 more without even trying.”

“Or you have the best week of your life, having amazing sex with the man of your dreams, who falls in love with your family and asks you to marry him on the spot.”

“You’re obsessed with marriage, aren’t you?”

“I was born to plan a bachelor party, I need _someone_ to get married.” Phichit eyed him eagerly.

“That’s you, Phichit, always thinking of yourself,” said Yuuri dryly. He hugged his best friend. “Thanks for not supporting my crazy.” He would just have to see what Victor said.

~~~~~

“So I was thinking about what we were talking about last night,” he began that night on the phone.

“You mean me coming to Japan?” asked Victor.

“Yeah. I...I’m started to wonder if it’s the best idea.”

“Why?” Did Victor sound disappointed? He sounded disappointed.

“I don’t know? But...really Hasetsu is not that great a town, and I don’t know if you’d really have a good time. There not much to do. I mean really, we could go anywhere.”

“I thought you wanted to see your family, though. Don’t you?”

“I...yeah. But...won’t it be weird for you? With my family there?”

“Do _you_ think it’ll be weird?” Victor was started to sound a little frustrated.

“I don’t know. Maybe? I mean, they...I love them, and they’re nice, but...I don’t know. It seems a little weird, to bring you home with me when we’ve only known each other, like, not very long.”

“If you don’t want to, Yuuri, that’s fine.” And now Victor sounded...polite. Carefully polite.

“Victor, it’s not...what do you think?” There was a pause.

“Do you think we’re moving too fast?” asked Victor instead of answering. “Am I being too pushy?”

“I...no. You’re not pushy, I don’t mean that at all,” said Yuuri. “Did I say anything like that?”

“No. I just...I can get clingy. Needy. And you’re right, we haven’t known each other that long, and maybe I need to...back off.”

“Victor, no!” Yuuri hadn’t meant that to come out so forcefully. “I don’t...I don’t want you to back off. Please don’t back off. I like...” He took a breath. “I think maybe I need someone...a little clingy. Otherwise, I’d probably decide you didn’t even like me. I’m not really good at...reading people sometimes.”

“Oh.”

“Really, Victor, I...I like how you are.” That was an understatement. “Who told you that you were clingy?”

“Oh, umm, a couple people I dated, I guess.”

“Well, don’t...don’t change anything, ok? I like you the way you are. A lot.” Yuuri blushed.

“I like you a lot, too, Yuuri. I...I want to come to Japan and see you.” Yuuri smiled.

“I want to see you too, Victor. Don’t think I don’t. I’m just anxious. I don’t want you to be disappointed.”

“I couldn’t be. Not if I get to spend time with you.” Victor’s voice had gone soft and dreamy in the way that made Yuuri melt.

“Vic-tor,” he sighed happily. “One problem is my room at home is small. If we go...I don’t know where we’ll sleep. It’s a small bed.”

“We could make it work. Or get a hotel room. I’d pay for it.”

“My parent’s house IS a hotel, Victor. Or ryokan. More of an inn.”

“So we can’t use one of those rooms?”

“Hmm, maybe. I guess.”

“Do you have a problem with your family...knowing about us? I mean, that we’d be sleeping together?”

“Mmm, we don’t really talk about things like that. I don’t know. I don’t think they’d really care. No,” he decided, “it doesn’t bother me much.”

“So let me pay for a room in your parent’s inn. We’ll sleep there. Or your room, whichever. Or you can sneak into my room after dark. And we’ll have a couple nights in a hotel while Nationals finishes, right?”

“Yeah, I guess. Depending on when you arrive.”

“There’s no way I could get out of attending the banquet or the gala, unfortunately. Otherwise I could leave Friday night.”

“You really won’t arrive in time for anything but the gala.”

“True, but that’s alright.”

“You don’t _have_ to come to Sapporo, you know,” said Yuuri. “You’ll be tired from your own event, surely.”

“No, I don’t have to, but I would like to see you skate, even if just your exhibition program. And I have to take advantage of every moment right after Nationals if I don’t want Yakov to have a heart attack yelling about it. I can talk him into a short break right after the event, but then I have to prep for Europeans.”

“Are you sure it’s ok? You do have less time between events than me.”

“Oh, I’ll be fine. I’m not even worried about either competition.”

“No, I guess you’re not,” said Yuuri remembering just who he was talking to. Victor Nikiforov was virtually guaranteed a gold medal at both Russian Nationals and Europeans, so long as he didn’t horribly injure himself.

“Well...” said Victor a bit awkwardly. “How are you feeling about Nationals? Any more confident?”

“I told you, confidence isn’t my strong suit. But...yeah, I do feel better. My free is better, so long as I don’t have another nervous breakdown.”

“That was special circumstances,” insisted Victor. “I...I wish you could feel more confident, Yuuri. I’d really like to see you skate your best. You would be extraordinary.” Yuuri’s face burned.

“Thank you, Victor,” he said softly after a moment. “That means a lot.”

“So have we decided we’re going to do this, then?” asked Victor. “The trip to Hasetsu, I mean.”

“Mmm, yes. If you’re sure.” Yuuri was not at all sure. His stomach roiled.

“I’m sure it’ll be great,” said Victor decisively. “I’ll fly to Sapporo, see you skate, we can spend a couple nights there, then fly to Hasetsu? Is that the easiest way to get there?”

“Yeah, it’s the fastest. Probably not the cheapest.”

“Oh. I know you said you don’t have a lot of money for extra travel...let me pay for this.” Yuuri was quiet for a moment. All his instincts said he should refuse, insist on paying his own way, but...he wasn’t entirely sure he could afford it. “Really, Yuuri, I want to. It’s not a big deal. I invited myself to your skating event, so let me pay for it.” Yuuri smiled.

“Hmm, honestly I can’t really afford to argue, so...” He thought a little more. “I’ll make sure my hotel reservation is extended. Guess I’ll have to explain why to Celestino...”

“And I have to tell Yakov why I’m running off to Japan.”

“So, I guess that means this will be out in the open soon.”

“Yeah? Is that a problem?” Victor sounded careful again.

“No, not exactly. But it’s...I mean you’re _you._ People are going to...react.”

“Hmm, I’m used to it, I guess. Aren’t you?”

“Vic-tor,” groaned Yuuri. “It’s not the same. Nobody cares about me. I’m just a dime-a-dozen skater from Japan.”

“That’s ridiculous, you’re one of the best in the world! You’re the best in your country! You can’t tell me you don’t have fans and press after you.”

“It’s not the same,’ he insisted. “Whatever. It’s just something else for me to worry about.” The conversation hit a lull.

“What are you worried about, exactly?” asked Victor finally.

“Nothing, it’s not important.”

“Can I do anything? To help? Do you want to try to...hide?”

“No. No...it’s just...” Yuuri took a deep breath. “I feel like people are going to see us together and...wonder what the hell you’re doing with me.”

“Yuuri,” breathed Victor. “They’re not. They should be asking how a mess like me is lucky enough to get such a heart-stoppingly beautiful man who could clearly have anyone he wanted. But probably they’ll just be jealous of both of us for being so incredibly sexy and talented.”

Yuuri covered his face with his arm to hide his grin. “You’re not a mess,” he said finally.

“Yeah, if you knew me better, you wouldn’t say that. I’m kind of a disaster. Ask Yakov. Or Chris.”

“Hmm, but you’re a beautiful, sexy, talented disaster,” said Yuuri, still grinning.

“You think I’m beautiful?” Victor only partly sounded like he was fishing for praise. He also sounded genuinely pleased.

“Of course I do,” he said, laughing at the whole idea. “I already told you the entire reason I knew I was gay to begin with was because of how gorgeous you were.”

“Well, I was a lot younger then.”

“Yeah. But you’re still just as beautiful. And probably sexier.”

“Really?” Victor’s delight now sounded completely genuine.

“Yes, Victor. Really, truly.” He shook his head at the absurdity of reassuring Victor Nikiforov that he was attractive. But it made his heart ache as well, in the same way it had when Victor called himself clingy and needy and a mess. Yuuri wanted to wrap his arms around him and tell him just how amazing he really was. He would when he saw him, he promised himself.

~~~~~

The remaining weeks until Nationals flew by, filled with training and arrangements for his trip home. First had come asking Celestino for permission. That had been fairly easy, when he explained he wanted to visit his family. He’d chickened out of explaining about Victor, but all in all it went well.

Then he’d had to call his family and give them the news. They were overjoyed to hear he was coming to visit. He had to interrupt his mother’s eager plans to explain he was bringing someone with him.

“A friend?” asked his mom. “Of course, that’s great, is he a skater, too?”

“Umm, yeah. He’s, umm, sorta more than a friend?” Ease them into it, he thought.

“Ooo, a boyfriend finally!” chuckled his dad.

“That’s wonderful, Yuuri!” said his mom in excitement.

“Yeah...it’s sort of new...we met at the Grand Prix Final.” He rubbed awkwardly at the back of his neck.

“One of the other skaters? How nice!” said Hiroko.

“Yeah...it’s, umm, it’s Victor, actually. Victor Nikiforov.” He winced. His dad was still smiling, seemingly oblivious to the importance of this revelation. His mother looked surprised, but she quickly covered it with a smile.

“Oh, Yuuri! You’re dating Victor? Really?” His face burned. He nodded.

“It just sort of...happened? He’s really nice, though, and we’ve been talking a lot...so he’s coming to see me in Japan. So...I kinda need you to take down all the posters of him on the walls in my room, ok?”

His mother laughed. “Does he know how much of a fan you are of him?”

“Sort of...but I still don’t want him seeing that...ok?”

“Ok, son, I’ll take care of it. He’s so handsome, too,” she added, beaming.

“Yeah, he is. Anyway, he said he’ll pay for a room while we’re there. I don’t know how booked you are right after Christmas...”

“Oh, we can’t charge him! He’s your boyfriend, that makes him almost family,” his mother insisted.

“Don’t you want him sharing your room, Yuuri?” asked his dad, eyes twinkling. Yuuri choked.

“Otousan!” His father laughed.

“I doubt we’ll be full then anyway, dear. Don’t worry, we’ll find a good room for him. And tell him not to worry about paying.”

It made Yuuri feel better about Victor paying to fly all the way to Japan, and paying for both of their airfare from Sapporo, at least.

“You said there a rink in town, right?” Victor asked him one night.

“Yeah.”

“Well, Yakov is yelling about me taking a whole week away from the ice, for some reason, so I promised him I wouldn’t completely stop training while I’m there. That won’t be a problem, will it?”

“Oh, no, not at all. Two of the friends I grew up skating with run it now. They’ll let us use it whenever, I’m sure.” Yuuri stopped and thought about what he was saying. Us. Him and Victor Nikiforov, skating on the same ice...training together? It made him feel a little faint.

“Wonderful! I’ll have to post some videos so Yakov knows I’m not completely slacking off.”

“My parents are really looking forward to meeting you,” he said.

“Yeah? And getting to see their son again, I bet.”

“Yeah. I can’t wait to eat my mom’s cooking again. I have to win gold at Nationals just so I can have her katsudon.” He was drooling just thinking about it.

“You can only eat it if you win?”

“Yeah, well, it’s fried pork cutlet and rice...I’d gain weight if I ate it all the time. I...I gain weight really easily. So it’s a treat for winning. But I haven’t had my mom’s katsudon in years. You have to try it, it’s the best thing ever.”

“Of course. Sounds amazing,” said Victor, and he was clearly smiling.

As the time of the competition neared, Yuuri’s anxiety rose. He was used to this feeling before events, but it was different this time. His skating was feeling better and better. He was actually less nervous about the competition and more anxious about the aftermath.

What was it going to be like to see Victor again? What if it was awkward or they didn’t work in person? What if they got tired of each other after being together for days? He ran through everything that might go wrong over and over.

But he also longed to see Victor in person. To assure himself that this was real, that Victor liked him, was attracted to him. They had phone sex several more times, Yuuri getting far more comfortable in front of his webcam. Sometimes he got hard just from hearing Victor’s voice. When he’d finally confessed it to Victor, the other man had talked so dirty for him that Yuuri got off in record time.

“Tell me what you’re going to do to me when you see me next week,” begged Victor, his hand tugging on his dick, legs spread wide.

“Oh, so many things,” said Yuuri, hand moving on his own erection. “The first thing I’m going to do, though, is get down on my knees and suck your cock.”

“Mmm, yeah? Are you gonna let me come?”

“Hmm, maybe. But then I’m still gonna be hard. What are you going to do about that?”

“Oh, I’m going to lay you down on the hotel bed and climb on top of you and ride your cock till you fill me up with your come,” said Victor, his voice going breathless. Yuuri whimpered at the mental image, moving his hand faster. “You like that idea? Yuuri, I can’t wait to get your cock inside me.” Victor spread his legs wider, sliding down in his chair. He wet a finger in his mouth and reach down to press it between his legs.

“Victor,” moaned Yuuri. “Yes, god, I want to fuck you.” Victor’s finger pressed inside and he moaned, both hands moving desperately. “Does it feel good Victor? You’re close, aren’t you.” Victor nodded, making a high-pitched whining sound. “Come for me, let me see you, baby.” Victor shuddered, then came, belly streaking with white. Yuuri wasn’t far behind, eyes locked on the way Victor’s hand was still moving between his legs.

“We’re not leaving the room in Sapporo,” said Victor, panting. “Room service and sex, that’s all.” Yuuri grinned.

“Works for me,” he agreed.

The last week until he left Detroit flew by in a whirl of training, preparations, packing, and last minute emergencies. His costume for his free program needed a minor repair and he couldn’t find his passport for an afternoon and then he had a minor panic attack.

“But what if I flop again and don’t make it to Worlds? What do I do then Phichit? How can I spend a week with the greatest figure skater in the world when I can’t even hold it together for one competition?” Yuuri only stopped asking questions when he ran out of breath. Phichit held his hands and encouraged him to breath.

“You’re going to do fine, Yuuri. You’ve been kicking ass in practice; I’ve seen you.” Phichit rubbed at his forearms soothingly. “And from what I can tell Victor is going to be crazy about you no matter what happens at the competition anyway. He’s still going to have ridiculous amounts of sex with you, and you are going to _enjoy_ it, ok, because you’ve had the hots for him since you were 12. So the worst possible thing that could happen is you are flying off to have so much great, hot sex that you may not be able to skate _after_ your week with Victor. Don’t even worry about before!”

Yuuri was laughing helplessly by this time. He was fairly sure there was a flaw in Phichit’s logic somewhere, but decided not to think about it hard enough to locate it. He threw his arms around his friend, his breathing starting to normalize.

“I wish you were coming with me,” he said.

“I’m kinda glad I’m not. I don’t want to play third wheel to your sexscapades. You’d leave me with Ciao Ciao and then he’d just get drunk and I’d have to go get into trouble on my own.” Phichit was grinning. “Oh, that reminds me, I got you a present.”

“You did? Why?” Yuuri felt suddenly guilty. He had been planning to buy Phichit a Christmas present during his trip, even though it would be late.

“Hmm, just to make sure,” Phichit said mysteriously. “Hold on.” He disappeared to his room while Yuuri lingered by the dining room table. Phichit returned, one hand behind his back. “I didn’t get a chance to wrap them.”

Yuuri heard the distinctive rustling of a plastic bag and then Phichit set a bag from the nearby pharmacy on the table. Yuuri eyed him suspiciously. “What did you...” he began, then looked in the bag. He laughed despite himself. “Condoms? Really?”

“No, look, _variety_ pack. Multiple variety packs. Different brands.” Yuuri investigated the two boxes Phichit held out for him. ‘Thinnest feel! Extra Lube! Pleasure Studs!’ the boxes informed him. He shook his head. But he noticed there was more in the bag.

“Ah, yes, of course,” he said. “Lube...also a variety pack. And multiple flavors. Flavors?” Phichit looked at him, shocked.

“You know...oh, just ask Victor what it’s for.” his friend said, eyes twinkling. Yuuri frowned, a bit concerned now.

“Best for last!” declared Phichit, holding up a small plastic package.

“Cock rings? They have cock rings at the pharmacy now?”

“Apparently so,” said Phichit. “I was a little surprised myself. But it’s definitely good to know in case of an emergency.”

“A cock ring emergency...right,” said Yuuri skeptically.

“You never know.”

“True. And...umm, thanks, I guess.” He shot his friend a wry smile.

“You would have wished your best friend bought you condoms for Christmas if you ran out, wouldn’t you?”

“I can’t argue with that,” he agreed. “Oh my god, wait! Victor’s birthday is Friday, on Christmas! I haven’t gotten him anything! What do I do?”

Phichit gestured to the bag of sex supplies. “Hand him that and take off your clothes?” he suggested. Yuuri laughed. “Don’t worry about it. You’re getting to be together, who cares about stuff?”

“Okay, okay.” Yuuri took a deep breath. He marked “present for Victor” onto his mental to-do list, somewhere after ‘win gold medal at Nationals.’

~~~~~

Yuuri left Detroit on Tuesday, the same day Victor was traveling to Yekaterinburg. Yuuri had the much longer trip, of course. He spent the long flight to Toyko watching terrible movies and playing video games, trying not to think about anything. He slept a bit, but not nearly as much as he should have.

They arrived in Sapporo Wednesday morning, Yuuri practically asleep on his feet by the time he and Celestino got to their hotel rooms. Yuuri remembered to confirm with the front desk that his room was reserved for an extra night and that it had a king sized bed. Celestino eyed him knowingly. Phichit must have told him about Victor, but they still hadn’t discussed it.

Yuuri spent the day sleeping and unpacking. He talked briefly with Victor in the evening, after Victor had finished his practice. Russian events started on Thursday, while Yuuri didn’t skate till Friday. The next day he took to the ice during the scheduled practice time, working to get used to the rink and the ice. He never liked these crowded practice sessions, with eyes tracking him as he worked through his programs, but he did his best to ignore them.

After his practice his primary goal was to find a way to watch Victor’s performance. Luckily he was invited by some of the other skaters to watch with them. One of them had the equipment to stream the event to his hotel room TV, apparently. It was a little strange for Yuuri to be socializing with the other skaters. He didn’t know the other Japanese skaters well, despite competing against many of them for years. He only ever saw them a few times a year, and they all knew each other well from training together or regional events. He didn’t regret moving to the US to train, but it did set him apart here. He sent a quick message to Victor.

 **Katsuki Yuuri:** Good luck!  
**Katsuki Yuuri:** I’ll be watching. ♥♥

Yuuri watched the short programs from the Russian championship in silence, for the most part. Victor took the ice towards the middle of the last group, and Yuuri held his breath. The room was silent as Victor skated, all of them knowing he was the best in the world. His performance was excellent, as usual. Yuuri thought it might be a little better than the last time he’d seen it. Victor looked confident, beautiful, strong. Yuuri belatedly realized he had been watching with a lovesick smile on his face and he looked around, hoping no one had noticed.

Victor scored at the top of the field, naturally. After his scores were announced and he waved to the camera from the kiss and cry, Yuuri felt like he was looking straight at him and he had to stop himself waving back. He pulled out his phone again.

 **Katsuki Yuuri:** That was great!  
**Katsuki Yuuri:** You look wonderful.

“Are you texting _Victor Nikiforov_?” asked an impressed voice from next to him. It was one of the junior skaters, a slight boy with tousled blond hair with a red lock at the front. Yuuri blushed.

“Umm, yes.” The other skaters all looked at him. “We met at the Grand Prix Final,” he explained. “Just congratulating him on his skate.”

“Oh, that’s right, there were those photos of you two together, _dancing,_ ” said one of the girls. Yuuri’s cheeks heated more.

“Yeah. That was at the banquet.” He looked away, trying to find something to distract attention away from himself. Luckily the next skater was starting and eventually everyone turned back to the TV. His phone buzzed.

 **Victor Nikiforov:** Thank you!  
**Victor Nikiforov:** Can’t wait to watch u tomorrow.

  
**Katsuki Yuuri:** Won’t you be busy?

  
**Victor Nikiforov:** I’ve got it worked out.  
**Victor Nikiforov:** Can’t miss my boyfriend skating!

  
**Katsuki Yuuri:** How long till you’re free? Can we talk later?

  
**Victor Nikiforov:** Uh, a couple hours still?  
**Victor Nikiforov:** I miss talking to you.

  
**Katsuki Yuuri:** Me too. I should still be up.

  
**Victor Nikiforov:** ヽ(o♡o)/

 

Yuuri laughed and then realized people were looking at him again. He slipped his phone back into his pocket.

“Are you... _dating_ Victor?” asked the Junior boy. Yuuri jerked.

“Were you reading over my shoulder?” he demanded. The boy blushed scarlet.

“Sorry, I couldn’t help it,” he said, a hand over his mouth. “Is it a secret?” Yuuri looked around the room, where half a dozen skaters were watching him with various expressions of awe.

“Well, not anymore, I guess,” he muttered.

“That’s amazing!” the boy said, excitement filling his face. “Oh, it’s like you two belong together, you’re the two most beautiful skaters in the world!” Yuuri spluttered at this.

“What? I’m not...Sorry, I’ve got to go,” he said vaguely, standing and fleeing. The boy’s words echoed in his mind for a long time. He shuddered with embarrassment, thinking about what the other skaters must have thought. They probably thought he considered himself on Victor’s level now. Which was ridiculous. Victor was so far above every other skater, that even if Yuuri had won silver at the GPF he wouldn’t be on the same level as him. Yuuri would be very lucky to win the Japanese National title, just so he could compete at the same event as Victor again.

All in all, Yuuri was feeling unsettled that evening. His nerves only grew as he waited for Victor’s call. He wished he could go skate to calm himself down. Finally, his phone rang.

“Victor?”

“Yuuri, hi!” Victor sounded elated, a bit breathless.

“Hi,” he said, trying to hide his nerves. “You sound cheerful.”

“Of course! I’m having a good time skating. And I get to see you in a few days.” Yuuri smiled.

“I thought you looked...different than you have this season,” he noted. “Happier?”

“Yes. Thanks to you,” Victor said in a more quiet tone.

“Me?”

“Of course, what else?” Victor laughed softly. “I’m skating like a man in love. That’s what Georgi said to me tonight.” Yuuri’s cheeks heated as a smile spread across his face.

“I...I can’t wait to see you,” he stammered after a brief silence. “Oh, and, you should probably know a room full of Japanese skaters just found out we’re dating, so...that could get out any moment, I guess.”

“You told a room full of people?” asked Victor, sounding pleased.

“Umm, not exactly. This nosy junior skater read our texts over my shoulder. But I...confirmed it.”

Victor just laughed. “Well, we knew we couldn’t hide it after this anyway, right? I mean, I haven’t exactly been hiding the fact that I’m flying to Japan as soon as the gala is over. Or why...”

“Oh. Yeah. I guess I wasn’t thinking of...people there. I was thinking I had a few days until everyone knew. That’s all.”

“Are you ok?” asked Victor, seeming to hear something in Yuuri’s voice.

“Oh, I just...guess I’m just getting nervous. It’s usually like this before events. And then...” he hesitated. He didn’t want Victor to take it the wrong way. “Well, everyone was looking at me when it came out about us and...I don’t know...I’m just trying not to freak out.”

“Yuuri,” said Victor. “I...I wish I was there, so I could hug you.” Yuuri smiled.

“It helps just talking to you,” he said.

“Then call me tomorrow before you go on the ice, ok? I mean, if you want.”

“I’ll be fine, Victor.” Yuuri wished he was as confident as he sounded.

“I know you will, _krasavchik._ ”

Yuuri felt much calmer by the time he went to bed that night. He didn’t think about the coming competition at all while he was trying to sleep, but instead thought about Victor, and what it would be like to have him here, in this very room, in this very bed, in only a few days.

Yuuri sense of calm carried him through all the preparations of the morning, a call to his family to wish them Merry Christmas, his warm-ups, and almost until he stepped onto the ice. He had texted Victor earlier, deciding he would wait to call until after he skated.

 **Katsuki Yuuri:** Happy Birthday, Victor!  
**Katsuki Yuuri:** And Merry Christmas  
**Katsuki Yuuri:** And Good Luck!

  
**Victor Nikiforov:** Thank you!  
**Victor Nikiforov:** Go get me a gold medal for my birthday  
**Victor Nikiforov:** ಠ‿↼

  
**Katsuki Yuuri:** I’ll do my best.

Yuuri’s performance flew by, his movements on auto-pilot. He felt like he could feel Victor’s eyes on him, even though he wasn’t even in the building. But instead of making him nervous, as it always had before when he’d thought Victor might be watching, it centered him. Reminded him that Victor was cheering him on.

He skated well, with only a couple minor bobbles on landings. His score carried him to the top of the competitors and kept him there. He breathed a sigh of relief. His smile was genuine when people congratulated him or complimented his skating. He gathered his courage and approached the skater who had hosted the viewing party the night before and asked if they were doing it again. He was invited back enthusiastically, with only a slight knowing grin when he mentioned Victor.

“Sorry about Minami-kun,” said the host. “He’s just young, and he’s a big fan of yours.”

“Oh,” said Yuuri, not sure how to respond to that. A while later, he looked around a corner and ducked into an empty hallway to call Victor. They had a brief conversation in which Victor congratulated him and he wished Victor luck before Victor had to get off the phone.

Of course Victor’s performance a couple hours later was perfect. That almost went without saying. Victor rarely made any errors. But Yuuri was spellbound for another reason. Because Victor’s free skate had changed since he’d seen it last. Not in composition: all the jumps and steps were the same. But he remembered Victor complaining about his emotional connection to the piece when they’d talked after the GPF. Now, no one could criticize his emotional performance: he practically left his heart on the ice, looking close to tears by the end.

Yuuri also was blinking away tears when it was done. He stood up before he’d realized he was going to, and left the room with nothing but a vague wave at the other skaters.

He headed for his room, typing a text to Victor already.

 **Katsuki Yuuri:** OMG Victor!  
**Katsuki Yuuri:** (º̩̩́⌣º̩̩̀ʃƪ)  
**Katsuki Yuuri:** Amazing!

He knew he couldn’t expect a response from Victor anytime soon. He’d left before his score was even announced. He searched for coverage he could watch on his phone, suddenly cursing himself for leaving before getting to see Victor in the kiss and cry. But he’d been about to start bawling, so…

He knew what Victor’s free skate was called: Stammi Vicino: “Stay Close To Me.” He knew the lyrics were asking someone to stay, not to leave. And tonight Victor had skated it with his whole heart. Was it possible he had skated it...for Yuuri? Was that self-centered? He’d wondered if Victor had commissioned the music with someone in mind. He’d wondered if Victor had experienced heartbreak recently when he’d first heard it, but from what Victor had told him, he hadn’t had anyone serious in a long time. So now...Yuuri was Victor’s boyfriend. Was Victor afraid he would leave? Was he asking him to stay?

Yuuri looked at his clock. It was getting late, and he really needed to sleep tonight before his free program tomorrow. He got ready for bed, but he knew he wasn’t going to sleep until he talked to Victor. His phone buzzed.

 **Victor Nikiforov:** You liked it?

  
**Katsuki Yuuri:** So much!

  
**Victor Nikiforov:** ♥♥

  
**Katsuki Yuuri:** you were incredible

  
**Victor Nikiforov:** I was skating for you

Yuuri gasped, closing his eyes and clutching his phone to his chest as he lay in bed. His heart was full of things he wanted to say to Victor, to say in response, but he...couldn’t. Not yet, not in a text.

 **Katsuki Yuuri:** ♥♥♥♥♥♥  
**Katsuki Yuuri:** I was crying.  
**Katsuki Yuuri:** I had to leave the room.

  
**Victor Nikiforov:** I have to go.  
**Victor Nikiforov:** so sorry

  
**Katsuki Yuuri:** call me later. I don’t care what time.

Yuuri’s heart was pounding and his whole body felt electrified. From texting. Not even sexy texting. But… ‘I was skating for you,’ Victor had said. Yuuri held those words close, let them fill his heart. Inside, the part of himself that had worshiped Victor for years was screaming. Yuuri knew then that it didn’t matter what happened in the future, or how long this romance with Victor lasted. No matter what, it would all be worth it, because he’d had this. Victor had cared about him enough to put it into his skating, and that meant more to Yuuri than any number of nights of passion.

Yuuri clutched the hotel pillow close to his chest, letting himself feel everything all at once. He didn’t know what to call the way Victor made him feel. Happy, excited, nervous, grateful, lustful, warm, scared, desperate, tender. He wondered if this was love. Was this what it felt like for everyone?

He wasn’t sure how long he lay there. He drifted, dozed in and out of sleep. And then finally his phone, still under his hand, rang and vibrated.

“Victor?” he said when he had fumbled the phone enough to answer.

“Yuuri, are you asleep? I’m sorry.”

“No, it’s ok, I told you to call. I was only half asleep.”

“You need to rest. You have your free tomorrow.”

“No, it’s not till evening. I’ll be fine. I wanted to talk to you. Hear your voice.” Yuuri felt like he was still drifting in and out of dream.

“I’m happy to hear your voice, too.” Victor’s voice was warm and Yuuri felt like he could sink into it. Yuuri thought of the messages they’d exchanged earlier, the emotions that had overtaken him. He wanted to _tell_ Victor about it, to share how it made him feel, but he didn’t even know how to start.

“Are you going out...to celebrate?” he asked instead.

“Yeah. My teammates insisted. So we’re going out to some club, I think.”

“Good. You should have fun on your birthday.” He was glad Victor wouldn’t be alone.

“Well I’d have a much better time if you were here,” Victor said flirtatiously.

“Mmm, yeah,” he agreed. “But you’ll be here in two days. Right here. In this bed.” Victor made a noise that was almost a groan.

“Yes I will. And I’m going to do so many things to you in that bed,” Victor promised in a low voice. A rush of heat traveled through Yuuri. He hummed in pleasure.

“Victor,” he said, “Are you in a rush?” He let his hand trace down his bare chest to the front of his pajama bottoms, hovering over the place where his cock already hardening.

“No,” answered Victor in a sultry tone. “Not if you want me to keep talking to you.”

“God, Victor.” Yuuri reached under his waistband, lightly touching his rapidly hardening cock. “You were so amazing tonight. It made me want to be there with you so badly.”

“Are you saying my skating made you hot?” asked Victor, sounding bemused.

“No...it made me cry, it was so beautiful.” Yuuri’s voice dropped lower. “Your voice right now is making me hot. Making me hard.” He gave his erection a first pump, his breath hitching in reaction.

“Yuuri,” said Victor and it was almost a moan. “You’re so incredible. I...I want you. God, I want you so bad.”

“Are you touching yourself?” Yuuri asked. “Are you as hard as I am?”

“Yes,” hissed Victor. Yuuri increased the speed of his hand.

“I can’t wait for you to fuck me again,” he said, and felt a surge of satisfaction when Victor moaned loudly in response.

“God, Yuuri, I want...I want everything. I want your cock in my mouth and I want to fuck you and I want you to fuck me...” he broke off with a gasp. Yuuri made a whimpering noise and rolled his hips. He was approaching orgasm quickly, having gone several days without release in the bustle of the competition.

“Fuck, Victor, I’m getting close,” he breathed. He breathed heavily into the phone for a moment, making needy sounds in his throat. “Victor, I need to hear you, please.”

Victor groaned and took a shaky breath. “Yuuri, I want to hear you come,” he murmured. “I love the way you sound when you come, love knowing you’re thinking about me.”

“Yes, Victor, yes.” Yuuri’s hips lifted off the mattress and he managed one last open-mouthed gasp before it hit him and he was rolling, leaving a trail of semen on the sheets as he curled around his pulsing cock.

“Fuck. Fuck,” said Victor quietly, and Yuuri could only silently urge him on as he shuddered in his own pleasure. Then Victor gave a strangled cry and Yuuri smiled fiercely, knowing he was coming.

They both breathed heavily into the phone for a while. Yuuri felt momentarily overcome with embarrassment, as he usually did after their phone sex. But the feeling passed as he was gripped by lassitude. “Victor,” he breathed and gave a satisfied moan.

“Mmm. That was lovely,” said Victor. “Are you going back to sleep now?”

“Yeah,” said Yuuri. “Definitely feeling sleepy and relaxed.”

“Ok, good. Rest up. I’ll talk to you tomorrow,” said Victor.

~~~~~

The next day Yuuri didn’t get to talk to Victor other than a couple of quick texts because he was skating his exhibition program and attending the banquet that evening. Which meant Yuuri was extra nervous before his skate. He had to wait through all the other skaters, trying not to watch their performances. He paced and stretched far more than he really needed to, trying to distract himself.

Finally he broke down, checking the time and doing some quick time zone calculations. Victor still had a couple hours until the gala. He tapped on his name to place the call. It rang for a while, Yuuri chewing on his lip.

“Yuuri?” Victor’s voice was concerned. “Everything ok? Aren’t you about to skate?”

“Yes,” said Yuuri, voice tight.

“Oh. Umm, nervous?”

“Yes,” he said again.

“Well,” Yuuri heard Victor walking, as if stepping away from someone for privacy. “You’re going to do amazing, Yuuri.”

“Yeah?” asked Yuuri in a small voice. “What if I don’t?”

“Not possible.”

“I’m...pretty sure it is. In fact, I know it is, because I was there.”

“You’ll still be amazing no matter what, Yuuri,” said Victor warmly. “And I’ll still love you, no matter what.” The sound of his heartbeat pounded in Yuuri’s ears. He took a breath, then another.

“Victor,” he breathed.

“I love you, Yuuri,” repeated Victor, voice barely more than a whisper. Tears sprang into Yuuri’s eyes. “I know it’s probably too soon to say that, but...I want you to know.”

“Victor, I...” There was a lump in his throat that he struggled to speak around. “Me too,” he managed finally. Suddenly his attention was caught by Celestino appearing in the doorway gesturing. “Fuck. I’ve got to go.”

“You’ll do great,” said Victor, voice a bit strained.

“Thanks, Victor...thanks,” Yuuri said and hung up. He swiped at his eyes to keep the tears from falling. He fell in walking behind his coach, taking deep breaths. He felt like his body was full of too many feelings, the fear and anxiety joined by joy, disbelief, and longing. And somewhere in there, a feeling he tried to draw on: a kind of peace. Victor loved him. And he loved Victor. He didn’t have time to worry about what it meant, or how long it would last or anything else. He had to accept it as truth, for the moment, for this moment. And it made him feel powerful.

He stepped onto the ice feeling almost outside himself, as if he was watching himself from a short distance. His body moved on its own, movements graceful and strong. ‘Now skating: Victor Nikiforov’s boyfriend,’ he thought and smiled slightly. And then the music started and he began.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter: They will occupy the same physical space! You know what that means. Yeah, it's the sex chapter. But, also feelings, because, it's me.
> 
> I have NOT finished the next chapter yet, since I have not been in the right headspace due to some issues like hardly sleeping for a couple days. So it will almost definitely be next week sometimes before I have it ready.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Victor arrives in Japan and he and Yuuri have a lot of...celebrating to do.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This took a little longer than I expected. I thought it would be the easiest chapter to write and I was very wrong. 
> 
> Buckle in for lots of smut!

It was the next day, and the Japanese National Champion in men’s singles, Katsuki Yuuri, was watching the women’s singles free programs. He was also clutching his phone in his pocket, to make sure he didn’t miss a message from Victor. 

Victor’s flight had left Yekaterinburg very early that morning and should be arriving any time now. Victor would take a taxi from the airport to the hotel and Yuuri had made sure a key was waiting for him at the front desk. But he wanted to get back to the room to be waiting for Victor. Unfortunately his status as the gold medalist made him conspicuous and he felt an obligation to watch as much of the competition as possible. This was the last event, however, with only the medal ceremonies and the gala exhibition on the following day. 

With only three skaters left in the field, his phone buzzed.

**Victor Nikiforov:** I’m on the ground.   
**Victor Nikiforov:** ٩(^ᴗ^)۶

**Katsuki Yuuri:** Ok, leaving the arena now. See you soon.

**Victor Nikiforov:** ƪ(♥ﻬ♥)ʃ

Yuuri did his best to sneak out of the event without anyone noticing him. He had plenty of experience being forgettable, after all. But even so, several people stopped him to congratulate him and one young skater asked for his autograph. He escaped finally, face red. The cold air of the streets outside was welcome as he walked the blocks to his hotel. He thought about running the distance, but decided he didn’t want to get sweaty and stinky, so he kept to a brisk walk. 

He made it to the hotel before Victor, so he flitted around the room making sure everything was ready. Not that he had anything to actually do. The room was clean, the bed freshly made by housekeeping. He had ensured the drawer next to the bed contained the bag of Phichit’s gifts. He brushed his teeth to make sure his breath was fresh, and looked at himself in the mirror. He was wearing his JSF jacket and pants. He stripped off the jacket to reveal a plain black long-sleeved shirt. It would be ridiculous to change clothing, he told himself. He ran a comb through his hair. 

He went back to the main part of the room, his stomach churning with anxiety. He threw himself onto the bed, face down, clutching the pillow. He lay there, trying not to die of anticipation. 

Finally, after what felt like an eternity, there was a knock at the room door. Yuuri’s heart thumped in his chest as he jumped up from the bed. He hurried to the door and didn’t bother to look through the peephole before opening the door. 

He barely had a chance to register Victor standing there, holding the handle of a suitcase, before he was tackled in an embrace. Yuuri released his hold on the heavy door as Victor’s momentum carried them a little ways into the room. And then Victor’s mouth was on his and he was reaching up to get a hold on the taller man’s shoulders so he didn’t fall. In the confusion of their initial fumblings, Victor turned them and Yuuri found his back pressed to the inside of the door. 

Victor kissed him with intent, like a man on a mission. Yuuri felt breathless and off-balance, but met each brush of lips and tongue with enthusiasm, making small noises of pleasure into Victor’s mouth. Victor’s body pressed him to the door, a thigh moving in between his legs and Yuuri couldn’t help grinding against it. It was as if all of his nervous energy had been converted suddenly into desire, focused on the man in his arms. 

Yuuri broke their kiss to gasp for air, but Victor didn’t pause, just moved his mouth to his jaw and throat. Yuuri shuddered hard at the feeling, one hand burying itself in Victor’s hair. 

“Victor,” he moaned, the first word either of them had spoken. 

As if a spell had been broken, Victor growled a little against his throat and murmured, “Yuuri, _moye serdtse._ ” Then he was kissing Yuuri’s lips again, and Yuuri cupped his face with both hands. Eventually, their kisses became less frantic, calmer, and they parted. 

“Victor,” said Yuuri, “Your suitcase is sitting in the hall still.” They looked at each other for a beat and then laughed. Yuuri pulled open the door and Victor dragged both his bags inside. 

“Two suitcases for a week?” teased Yuuri. 

“Yes?” replied Victor, “I thought three would be difficult to handle.” Victor pulled his bags into the main part of the room, until he could push them against the wall out of the way. He shed his coat as well and laid it across the bags.

“Are you exhausted?” asked Yuuri, following behind. 

“I slept on the plane,” said Victor, turning back to face him. He stepped into Yuuri’s personal space, raising a hand to his chin. “I knew I’d need energy.” He kissed Yuuri, taking his time, tasting his lips. Yuuri sighed and wrapped his arms around Victor’s neck. 

Victor steered him backwards until the bed hit the backs of his knees and he sat abruptly. He pressed a hand into Yuuri’s chest, pressing his back to the bed and straddling his hips to follow him down. Yuuri’s stomach flipped as Victor’s body covered his. Victor was kissing his neck again, nibbling along the side. 

Yuuri gasped and clutched at him, only to shudder when Victor pressed his crotch down against his own. They were both hard, and Yuuri pressed shamelessly up against Victor without any ability to stop himself. His desire was burning and Victor was everywhere over him, touching him, kissing him, surrounding him. 

And then suddenly Yuuri’s emotions rose up and twisted, turning to panic in his throat. He clutched harder at Victor’s shoulders, which made the man on top of him moan and move to kiss his mouth again. But Yuuri pulled away sharply, taking short, shallow breaths. 

Victor stilled, frowning. “Yuuri?”

“Sorry,” panted Yuuri. “Can we just...slow...down...a little?” Victor looked surprised for a moment then he reacted all at once.

“Oh. Oh, sure, of course,” he said, pushing himself up and off of Yuuri. He ended up on his side, looking at Yuuri with concern. Yuuri pulled his legs up and crossed his arms over his chest. 

“Sorry,” he said again.

“No, no,” said Victor quickly. “Are you...okay?” 

Yuuri nodded. “Just...a little...overwhelmed?”

“Was it anything I did?”

Yuuri shook his head emphatically. “No, definitely not.” He was quiet for a moment, focusing on his breathing. “I can’t even explain it...it was just a lot at once and...I don’t know.” He squeezed his eyes shut tight for a moment, ashamed of his overreaction. Then he forced himself to open them back and turn to look at Victor. 

He still looked worried, but seeing him, lit up by the afternoon sun shining behind his silver hair, made a smile spread slowly across Yuuri’s face. Victor was really _here_ , in the room, right next to him on the bed. Suddenly Yuuri felt amazing and he couldn’t stop smiling. 

Victor smiled back a bit bemusedly. Yuuri slid over closer to him and ducked his head down to kiss him, both of them smiling against each other’s lips. Victor’s arm came around him and Yuuri settled in against him.

“Okay?” asked Victor softly. Yuuri nodded. 

“It’s good to see you,” he said, tilting his head up to kiss Victor’s jaw. 

“Mmm, you too.” Victor stretched his spare arm out over his head and rested his head on it. “Congratulations. You skated beautifully.” Yuuri’s cheeks heated but he smiled.

“It’s because of you. You calmed me down yesterday.”

“Did I? I was worried I might have made things worse.” Victor looked more uncertain than Yuuri had ever seen him, his eyes darting away.

“No. You...told me what I needed to hear.” Yuuri’s voice had gone soft. 

“I meant it,” said Victor soberly. Yuuri met his eyes and nodded. He leaned up and kissed Victor gently, trying to put the words he couldn’t say into action. Victor clutched him tighter, the kiss gradually deepening. The urgency of their earlier embrace was mellowed, and they were content to explore each other’s mouths for the time being. 

Victor’s hand found bare skin as Yuuri’s shirt rode up. His hand exploring Yuuri’s back made him arch against him, starting a slow, luxurious rhythm of their bodies shifting against one another. Yuuri sighed into Victor’s mouth as his groin pressed into him. Victor wrapped his leg over Yuuri’s, bending his neck back to kiss him deeper. Yuuri’s whole body bent like a bow. He trembled against Victor, finally breaking away from his lips when he couldn’t get enough air. Their hips both moved to their own rhythm, seeking stimulation.

“Can I…?” asked Victor, hesitating. 

“What?” 

“Take your shirt off?” Yuuri huffed a laugh, and nodded. Victor pushed his shirt up the rest of the way, and they pulled it over his head together. Yuuri reached for the hem of Victor’s shirt, but he didn’t have a chance to lift it before Victor had dived for Yuuri’s bare chest, leaving a trail of kisses from his shoulder down. 

Yuuri fell back and relaxed under the gentle onslaught. While Victor’s mouth found his nipple and sucked, Yuuri tugged at Victor’s shirt, determined. He eventually managed to bunch up his shirt enough that Victor laughed and lifted it off before returning to working his way down to Yuuri’s abs. Yuuri stroked his hand across the small portion of Victor’s back that he could reach. Feeling his skin under his fingers helped ground him in the reality that he was really here, this was happening. 

Victor mouthed at his stomach, his tongue tracing curving paths. Yuuri shuddered and then jerked as Victor’s hand gripped his thigh through his pants. Victor paused and looked up at him. “Too much?” he asked. Yuuri shook his head.

“I need...” Yuuri lifted his hips in silent plea. Victor’s hand slid up his thigh as if magnetized, coming to rest lightly over Yuuri’s aching erection. “Oh, please,” Yuuri gasped.

“Yes?” Victor’s hand tugged at the elastic waist of his pants.

“Yes, please,” he replied. And then Victor was pulling down his pants and underwear together, exposing Yuuri. And he had to shut his eyes to block out the stimulation but then Victor’s hand was on his cock and he groaned. 

Victor stoked him slowly, as if testing, and Yuuri chanced opening his eyes and looking at him. He groaned again at the sight of Victor, head propped up on one bent arm, watching him while he stroked Yuuri’s cock. Yuuri let his eyes fall closed again, taking in the strange feel of Victor’s hand.

“Can I blow you?” asked Victor, making Yuuri whimper.

“Yes,” he breathed and opened his eyes to watch Victor’s head bend over him. He couldn’t see anything from this angle other than the top of Victor’s head, so when he felt the first warm, wet touch of his mouth he screwed his eyes shut and focused on not coming immediately. He couldn’t resist burying a hand in Victor’s hair, not putting much pressure on it, but grounding himself with the touch. 

“Victor, yes,” he moaned, “oh, fuck.” Victor’s mouth was heaven. Maybe the best part was the way Victor was making noises of pleasure while he sucked, vibrating around Yuuri’s cock. Unlike other partners he’d had, it felt like this was something Victor was truly enjoying, and not something done out of obligation. It let Yuuri relax and really feel the sensations without worrying about what his partner was thinking. “Oh, Victor, I’m close,” he said. Victor moaned again and increased his efforts, taking Yuuri deep. After a few breathless moments, Yuuri tumbled over the edge, shouting as he jerked up into Victor’s mouth. 

Victor swallowed, laughing a little in a satisfied way. He continued to suck on his cock a while longer, as if savoring it. Yuuri released his grip on Victor’s hair, panting while he waited for his heart to stop pounding alarmingly in his chest. Warm contentment spread outward through his body, relaxing him by degrees. Victor fell to Yuuri’s side, wiping his mouth with his forearm, breathing heavily. He grinned up at Yuuri, who smiled back.

“I have thought about doing that so many times,” he said, making Yuuri flush. 

“That was...mmm...so good,” he said, tugging Victor up so they were on the same level. Yuuri turned his body towards Victor, enmeshing their legs so he had one of Victor’s thighs in between his own. He felt Victor press his erection against his leg. “Give me a minute and I’ll...”

“No problem,” said Victor, smiling. He brushed some hair off Yuuri’s forehead. “Feeling more relaxed?”

Yuuri nodded. “Mmm-hmm. Very.” 

“So if you get anxious you’re saying I should just give you a blow job?” teased Victor.

Yuuri chuckled. “I don’t think that would exactly work in every situation.” He laughed some more. “Can you imagine, before I have to go on the ice? Sorry, I just need a moment with my competitor in private...”

“I can _definitely_ imagine that,” said Victor, leaning in to capture his lips. Yuuri went from laughing to breathless quickly as the kiss heated. Yuuri could tell Victor was still tense with need in the way he kissed, the way he gripped the back of Yuuri’s head. 

Yuuri ran a hand down Victor’s torso in between them, enjoying the feel of his muscles shifting. He slid his hand lower to brush the bulge in Victor’s tight jeans. Victor’s breath caught and he pressed into Yuuri’s hand. Yuuri reached for the fastenings of his jeans, fumbling to get them open without breaking away from Victor’s mouth. Finally he managed it, his hand darting under the waistband of Victor’s underwear to grip his hot, silky length. With the first pump of his hand they both moaned, their kiss finally breaking off. Yuuri watched Victor’s face as he stroked him awkwardly, the angle not allowing much movement. 

There was a part of Yuuri that still marveled that he was with Victor Nikiforov, that he was touching his cock and watching as his beautiful face melted into pleasure. “Victor,” he whispered, and his boyfriend’s eyes opened, the gorgeous blue of them focusing on him. Yuuri was filled with the desire to give as much pleasure as he could to this man. “What do you want?” he asked, voice soft.

“Anything,” answered Victor without hesitation. “Anything, Yuuri.” His eyes closed for a moment. “I’m not going to last long no matter what, though.” He looked at Yuuri again. “I’d like...your mouth?”

Yuuri’s lips curved up and he removed his hand from Victor’s pants with a final twist that made his lover jerk. Victor helpfully pushed his jeans down and off his legs with a little struggle, then his bikini style underwear (which he looked ridiculously good in.) When Victor was naked Yuuri took a moment to look at him, at the utter perfection of him. Victor gripped his cock and gave Yuuri a plaintive look. 

Yuuri grinned and flipped himself around so he was lying on his stomach with his head by Victor’s hips and his legs towards the head of the bed. As he lifted himself up to take Victor’s cock into his mouth, Victor’s hand reached for the back of Yuuri’s thigh. When he flicked his tongue out to tease at the head of his cock, Victor’s hand clamped down hard. The fingers digging into the tight muscle of his leg made Yuuri’s groin tighten pleasantly. He had lots of fantasies about Victor’s hands gripping him like that, ones he hoped to explore later. 

For now he took Victor into his mouth and worked at giving the best blow job he could. Victor seemed appreciative, to judge from his moans and gasps and the way his hand gripped at Yuuri’s thigh. It slid upwards as Yuuri worked, until Victor was digging his fingers into the place where his thigh met his ass. His hand tightened almost painfully right before Victor gasped out, “Oh, god, Yuuri, I’m coming.” Yuuri appreciated the warning, but there was no way he was pulling back, so he swiped his tongue over the head one more time. Then his mouth was filling with salty cream and he did his best to swallow as Victor twitched and jerked beneath him. 

“Fuck,” said Victor appreciatively as he sat up. Yuuri got up to grab his water bottle to rinse his mouth, carrying it back and offering it to Victor. Then he settled against his lover, stretching his limbs across him and pillowing his head on his shoulder. This was incredible, just pressing their naked bodies together. 

“Welcome to Japan,” he said after a moment, earning a chuckle from Victor. 

“It’s so good to touch you again,” said Victor, his hand trailing down Yuuri’s back, cupping his ass. 

“Mmm,” agreed Yuuri, before shifting up to claim a kiss. They kissed slow, licking into each other’s mouths lazily, Victor’s hand still kneading at his ass.

“Are you getting hard again already?” asked Victor incredulously. Yuuri blushed and pressed his face into Victor’s chest. 

“Maybe,” he said, pressing his semi-hard cock against his hip. 

“God. Are you always that quick to recharge?” 

Yuuri lifted himself up enough to see Victor’s face and give him a coy look. “Not _always._ ” Victor’s eyes widened in a combination of alarm and arousal. 

“Oh, this is going to be fun. If it doesn’t kill me,” Victor said, gripping Yuuri by the hip and arm. “Come here, lay on me,” he said, pulling Yuuri into place on top of him. 

“I’m not too heavy?” asked Yuuri, turning his face into Victor’s neck. 

“No, you’re fine. I like the feeling,” said Victor. “Plus, I really need to get both hands on your ass.” He did so, pressing Yuuri’s nearly hard cock into his body more firmly. Yuuri hummed as Victor kneaded his ass, fingers squeezing and slipping a little in between his cheeks. He mouthed at Victor’s throat, licking in time with the shifting of his hips. 

“Mmm, Yuuri, do you want to fuck me?” asked Victor after a while, when Yuuri’s cock was starting to ache and his movements had become more driven. Yuuri moaned just at the thought of it, squirming against Victor. “Is that a yes?” Victor’s voice was amused. 

“I...you know I’ve never done that before,” he said, uncertainty killing some of his lust.

“I know. But I really want you, darling,” said Victor, hands squeezing his ass again. “It’ll be fine. Unless you don’t want to. It’s ok if you’re not ready,” he added. 

Yuuri pushed himself up, arms straight as he looked down on Victor. Of course he wanted him. They’d talked about it enough times, and Yuuri had imagined the act in detail. His stomach flipped over, but the rest of his body was very clear about what it wanted. Having Victor underneath him like this made him feel powerful and desirable. He wanted to give Victor what he wanted as well.

“Alright,” he said finally. “You want me to fuck you?” he asked, with a confidence he didn’t entirely feel. Victor’s lips parted and his chest moved in shallow, panting breaths.

“Yesss,” he replied, hands stroking up and down Yuuri’s sides. “Please.” Yuuri dipped down for a kiss, needing the reassurance for a minute. Then he rolled off of Victor, opening the drawer of the bedside table. He rummaged in the pharmacy bag and couldn’t help laughing a little at Phichit’s ridiculousness. 

“What?” asked Victor from behind him. 

“Ok, so Phichit is responsible for everything in this bag, FYI,” he explained. Victor shifted and scooted closer to peer over Yuuri’s shoulder. 

“What’s in there?” he asked curiously.

“Oh, just _lots_ of condoms and lube...and whatever kind of cock rings they sell at the corner store.” He knew his face was red as he turned back around to Victor, bringing the bag with him to let Victor root through as he tore open one of the variety packs of condoms. He pulled out a couple different condom packets before deciding to go with the plainest looking. 

Meanwhile Victor was opening the box of the cock ring, pulling out a clear, stretchy ring wrapped in plastic and reading the box. “Can be used up to six uses,” he quoted. “Up to? That doesn’t sound like enough. He only got one?”

Yuuri snickered. He opened the variety pack of lube, pulling out a handful of single-use packets. “There’s like fifteen different kinds. ‘Tingling, Warming, Pina Colada...’” 

“Ooo,” said Victor. Yuuri shot him a look. “No, not for now,” he said. “I’ll eat you out later, though.” Yuuri’s face went red and a shiver traveled down his spine. 

He held out a handful of packets to Victor, three types of plain lube. “Umm, preference?” Victor looked, shrugged, and selected one. Yuuri set the rest of the bag back in the drawer, plucking the cock ring and it’s packaging from Victor’s hands and tossing them in as well.

“Not going to try it?” asked Victor with a grin. 

“I don’t think I need any...complications right now,” said Yuuri, trying for a humorous tone, but his stomach clenched nervously. Victor’s face softened and he reached for Yuuri, pulling him close until they were chest to chest again. They kissed, Victor running his hands up and down Yuuri’s back. Yuuri’s erection, which had flagged somewhat during their examination of the supplies, stiffened as he pressed against Victor. 

“I can ride you, if that would be better for you,” offered Victor. Yuuri considered. He pushed up enough so he could look down on Victor. 

“I don’t know. I’m really enjoying the way you look under me,” he said, voice breathy. Victor clutched at his hips, fingers digging in. 

“Mmm,” he said. “It’s up to you. Whatever you want.” A shiver went down Yuuri’s spine.

“What I want,” he said, leaning down to taste Victor’s lips again, “is you. Any way. Every way.” Victor moaned against his lips. Yuuri’s cock dragged across Victor’s which he thought was starting to show signs of hardening again. 

Yuuri pushed himself up and then moved down Victor’s body until he was kneeling between his knees. He ignored the anxiety growing in his belly and chest and instead focused on each individual step. He opened the packet of lube, coated his fingers messily, reached between Victor’s legs, pressed one finger in slowly. It was a strange moment, with Yuuri not entirely confident in what he was doing, with only his exploration of his own body as his guide. Victor responded enthusiastically, gasping encouragement as Yuuri explored him. 

He took his time, afraid of causing pain, and Victor had to ask him for a second finger and then a third. By that point Victor was nearly begging, and Yuuri decided he liked that tremendously. Yuuri also enjoyed watching Victor’s cock harden as he stroked inside him. Yuuri’s own cock was becoming more difficult to ignore and the urge to push into Victor grew stronger and stronger. Yuuri did ignore it, though, deciding he wasn’t going to do it until Victor asked. 

“God, Yuuri, please,” Victor plead. Yuuri grinned.

“Please what?” he asked innocently. Victor let out a pained groan. Yuuri pressed his fingers in deeper, making him gasp.

“You’re...you’re amazing,” Victor choked out. “I love you.” Yuuri’s grin stretched so wide his face hurt. 

“What do you want me to do, Victor?” he asked again. 

“God, I want you to fuck me, please.” Victor was almost sobbing. “Please, Yuuri, please, I need your cock inside me.” The words made his cock jump and it was a good thing he was about to get some relief or he would have had to touch himself. 

Yuuri withdrew his fingers and looked around for the condom he’d picked out earlier. He tore the packet, struggling a bit with his slippery hands, and rolled the condom over himself. He squeezed the last of the lube from the packet over his cock. And then he knelt in place, guiding himself to Victor’s opening. 

He had a moment of heart-pounding fear, but then he looked at Victor’s face. The most beautiful man in the world was watching him, waiting for him with a look of desperate longing. Yuuri would do anything for that man, could do anything to please him. So he pressed forward, surprised at how easily Victor’s body parted and how smoothly he slid into him. 

Victor moaned as Yuuri pressed into him. Yuuri was silent, his breath frozen in his lungs by the incredible feel of it. It was entirely unlike a hand or a mouth, or anything he’d ever felt before. So tight and yet soft, hot and slick, and he felt like he suddenly understood what all the fuss was about. He made himself focus on Victor so he wouldn’t just chase his own pleasure. Victor was watching him with wide eyes, mouth open taking shallow breaths. 

“Is it ok?” he asked, voice rough. Victor nodded eagerly.

“So good, Yuuri,” he whispered. Yuuri was bottomed out inside him, still for the moment. He panted and the thought crossed his mind that it was ridiculous to be out of breath when he had barely moved at all. They were both professional athletes! Yuuri shifted back carefully, slowly, his eyes falling shut at the amazing feel of it. “Yes, please, fuck me,” moaned Victor. Yuuri made a needy noise in his throat at that. 

He started moving, small movements at first, then longer strokes as he got used to the sensations. He felt like he might fly apart any second, like this feeling couldn’t possibly be sustained for long. He leaned further over Victor, but wasn’t nearly tall enough to kiss him. “Victor, you feel so damn good,” he said instead. 

“You too.” Victor reached a hand between them and pulled at his cock, groaning as he did. “Harder,” he pleaded. Yuuri shifted position to make it easier to give him what he wanted. He grasped Victor’s thighs, using his arms to pull himself harder against Victor’s body. Victor whimpered. He was stroking his cock faster now, and Yuuri did his best to match his rhythm to Victor’s. 

“Please, please, I’m so close, it’s so good...” Victor’s face and neck was red, his body tensed and covered in sweat. Yuuri watched him closely, wanting to see every moment of his pleasure, wanting to see how he affected his lover. And then Victor’s spine arched and he shuddered hard, painting lines of white across his torso as he came. Yuuri slowed the rhythm of his fucking, breathing hard as he watched Victor thrash his head from side to side as he rode his orgasm. 

Eventually Victor’s eyes opened back up and he looked at Yuuri with a stunned expression. His body had taken on a relaxed sprawl, arms fallen limply to the mattress. “Fuck,” he said. Yuuri smiled and Victor smiled back, a smile that seemed to light the room. “What are you waiting for?” he asked. “I want to know what it feels like when you come inside me.”

Yuuri considered objecting that it would probably not feel like much since he was wearing a condom, but decided that wasn’t the point, so he started moving again. He realized how much he had been holding back, trying not to come too soon, and he let go that control. He let his body move how it wanted, however felt best, and he was soon fucking into Victor in short, sharp strokes and keening in pleasure as he did. 

It wasn’t long before the wave of his climax overtook him, and he collapsed onto Victor. He shuddered hard with his face pressed to Victor’s chest, his hips still moving beyond his control. Victor’s arms wrapped around him, making him feel safe and protected. By the time he was still, the sudden sensitivity forcing him to stop, he had tears in his eyes. Victor rubbed his back soothingly, pressing soft kisses to the top of his head. Yuuri moaned, his body still thrumming with pleasure. 

“Good?” asked Victor. 

“Oh my god, Victor,” he said, words slightly slurred. A laugh rumbled through the chest beneath him. Yuuri pushed himself up, arms shaky. “That was...that was better than I imagined.” He huffed a laugh. “And I have a good imagination.” 

“So you like topping?” asked Victor, eyes glinting. 

“... _yes._ ” Yuuri’s face burned, but he smiled down at Victor anyway. 

“I’m very glad to hear it.” Yuuri pushed back, withdrawing carefully from Victor’s body. He stood on shaky legs to dispose of the condom and clean himself up, bringing a wet washcloth for Victor. He laid back down next to his boyfriend, who turned and snuggled close to his side.

“Did you like it more than you liked bottoming when we were together in Sochi?” he asked.

Yuuri made a considering noise. “I don’t know. Yes? It’s hard to say because that was, you know, our first time and I could barely believe it was happening. And I was a little drunk.” Yuuri smiled wickedly. “I think we’ll have to test it out again before I can really tell.” Victor looked up at him with his widest grin. Then startled as his stomach gave a loud rumble. 

“Hungry?” asked Yuuri, laughing. 

“Starving.”

“Well, we could go get something. There are some good places within walking distance,” he said.

“Room service,” insisted Victor. “Remember? Room service and sex, that’s all we are doing.” Yuuri giggled. 

“Well, if you insist,” he replied with false reluctance. He grabbed the room service menu from the table by the bed. They consulted over what to order for a few minutes, arguing about training diets and how closely they should be followed. Finally they settled on grilled fish for both of them. Yuuri assured Victor they’d be eating lots of indulgent food in Hasetsu. 

They took a shower while they waited for the food to arrive. Yuuri didn’t intend to join Victor when he announced he needed a shower, but then he pulled Yuuri up and right into the bathroom. They pressed against each other under the hot water, hands sliding over slippery skin, taking turns lathering each other with soap. If they hadn’t both come twice already they would almost certainly have ended up having sex in the shower, but as it was they just giggled and explored each other. Yuuri learned that Victor’s sides and underarms were ticklish.

Yuuri put his clothes from earlier back on, but Victor claimed one of the hotel robes. He claimed it was pointless to get dressed when they’d just end up ripping the clothes off each other again soon. Yuuri couldn’t quite face the idea of the hotel staff delivering their food and seeing them both in the room clearly undressed. It would be obvious they had been having sex. And it just wasn’t anyone’s business, right? 

Victor sat in a chair and pulled Yuuri down onto his lap. He didn’t seem to be able to keep his hands (or mouth) off Yuuri. Honestly, it wasn’t like he minded. But part of his brain kept telling him that this didn’t make sense, that there wasn’t any reason for Victor to be this enthusiastic about Yuuri. As usual, he did his best to push that voice away and just enjoy the moment. 

The knock at the door interrupted their kiss, and Yuuri greeted the man carrying their tray in Japanese. Victor insisted on paying, however, needing Yuuri’s help with the cash he’d exchanged at the airport. They settled down to eat at the tiny round table in the corner of the room. 

“So what time is the gala tomorrow?” asked Victor in between bites.

“It starts at 5. I have ice time in the morning at 9.”

“Do you want me...it’s probably best if I don’t come with you in the morning,” said Victor. “I mean, unless you want me there. But I’d probably be a distraction.”

“Oh.” Yuuri stopped, considering. The thought of Victor accompanying him to the rink hadn’t occurred to him, and now that he’d brought it up, he didn’t know what the right answer was. In truth, Victor likely _would_ be a big distraction, with a fuss made over his presence and their relationship. The thought of the likely press swarm made him cringe. But did Victor want to come? Was he hinting for an invitation? Yuuri chewed his lip. Victor was watching him.

“Did you want me to come?” Victor asked, frowning a bit.

“Well, uh, if you want to you could,” he said, looking down at his plate. There was a moment of silence as he shoveled a forkful of fish into his mouth. 

“Is there anything really good to do in town? I could go out sightseeing,” said Victor with a casual air that sounded slightly forced. 

“Oh, well, I don’t know the city really well, but there’s...a bunch of parks and shrines, lots of ramen places, a beer museum, and some historical stuff? The only thing I’ve ever really done here is compete and eat.” He shrugged apologetically. “But you’re probably right about being a distraction. The media would go nuts, and...I’d rather that happen after I skate?” He held his breath for Victor’s reaction, but a warm smile spread across his face. 

“You’re right. I didn’t even think about press being at training. So maybe I could just go shopping? Are there good places to shop?”

“Probably. I know there’s some touristy places, but what were you looking for?”

“Oh, you know, whatever. Not junk, but things I can’t get at home? And I always need clothes.” 

Yuuri shot Victor a skeptical look. “Really?” Victor looked at him wide-eyed.

“Of course. I’m sure there’s some great fashion to be found,” he said sincerely.

Yuuri huffed a laugh. “Well I don’t know where would be the best place to go, but I can find out.” After they finished their meal Yuuri found his cell phone and hesitated, his finger hovering over his contact list. But there was only one person to call.

“Yuuri!” Minako’s greeting was enthusiastic in a way that implied she wasn’t entirely sober. “Where are you?”

“I’m at the hotel, of course. Look, I just have a quick question,” he wanted to hurry the conversation along as much as possible. He cringed to think of the kind of things Minako would say about his relationship with Victor, especially if she’d been drinking. “Do you know a good place to go shopping here in Sapporo?”

“Shopping? You?”

“No, not for me. For a friend. You know, someplace nice with good clothing stores maybe?”

“Of course! There’s the three malls by Sapporo Station. They’re all connected. Stellar Place is the most upscale of the three, but they all have lots of stores.”

“Thanks, Minako! I’ll see you tomorrow!” He tried to end the call but she was too quick.

“Wait, Yuuri, isn’t your Victor getting in tonight?” Minako sounded more confused than suspicious. “Are you really dating him, Yuuri?”

“Yes,” he said, a bit defensive. 

“Wow. I didn’t think you had it in you, kid. I want all the details when we get a chance to talk back home, ok?” Yuuri’s face burned. 

“Minako,” he objected. She just laughed, but thankfully ended the call. He’d been afraid she might show up at his hotel room and demand to be introduced or something. And he had plans for the evening.

He informed Victor what he’d found out. Victor extended a hand to him, and when Yuuri went closer to his chair, Victor pulled him back into his lap again. 

“Where were we before we were interrupted?” he asked, voice low and seductive. Yuuri sighed happily and bent down to kiss him. While they kissed slow and unhurried, Victor’s hands constantly roamed over Yuuri’s body. He loved it, loved how Victor’s touch made him feel valued and desired. He grew bold enough to reach a hand inside the deep V of Victor’s robe, exploring the feel of his chest. Victor’s mouth worked it’s way down to his neck, nipping lightly but not enough to mark. Until he reached the junction of his shoulder, when he sucked hard, clearly intentionally creating a more permanent impression. 

“Victor,” Yuuri moaned, the sensation sending a pulse of desire through him, as well as the idea of being marked by Victor. After another moment of suction, Victor moved back to admire his work. He grinned up at Yuuri.

“Will you call me Vitya?” he asked. 

“Vitya?” Yuuri replied, cocking his head to the side. 

“It’s...a nickname, I guess? A diminutive. In Russia, everyone has a diminutive name that just people close to them use. Mine’s Vitya.”

“Oh. I never heard anyone call you that.” Victor shrugged. 

“Other Russians do, mostly. But professionally, I’m Victor. It’s easiest if everyone is calling me the same thing. But I’d like you to call me Vitya. At least when we’re alone.” He looked slightly shy making the request, which made Yuuri’s heart thump.

“Of course,” he said, smiling. “Is it...a private thing?”

“Oh, no. It’s just casual. I guess it’s sort of like using a first name instead of last. Except, I know it’s the opposite in Japan. You know what I mean though.” Yuuri nodded. “I just meant, since people know me as Victor it might confuse people if you called me Vitya around skating people. I know it’s confusing. Russians have about a million names each. There’s actually whole different pet names that family and lovers use.”

“Well what’s that then?” asked Yuuri, laughing a little. 

“Oh, for Victor it can be Vitenka, Vityusha, Vityasha, Viktorka, Vitasha...” Victor’s eyes were sparkling at Yuuri. Yuuri shook his head. “Just call me Vitya. I used to get called Vitenka, and...” he shrugged. Yuuri remembered what he’d said about being estranged from his family. 

“Ok, Vitya,” he said, and Victor’s face lit. They kissed as if to seal the agreement. Victor wrapped his arms tighter around Yuuri’s waist.

“Aren’t I heavy?” he asked.

“Nope.” Victor nuzzled into Yuuri’s neck. “You skated so well yesterday. I was proud of you.” He pressed a kiss to Yuuri’s skin and his breath hitched, more at the words than the kiss. “Does that sound weird? If I say I was proud of you?”

Yuuri blushed but shook his head. “I don’t think so.” Victor beamed.

“Good. I should be able to be proud of my boyfriend.” Victor kissed his clavicle, right above the neck of his t-shirt. “So...you get...stage fright?” His tone was gentle, but it wiped the smile from Yuuri’s face. He sighed heavily.

“I get everything fright. I’m not...mentally strong.” He focused his gaze on a spot over Victor’s shoulder.

“Yuuri,” chided Victor, “What do you mean? Do...where did you get that idea from?” Yuuri was surprised into glancing at Victor’s face. He looked upset, almost annoyed. Yuuri jerked back involuntarily, Victor’s arms around him stopping him from moving away. 

And suddenly he needed to be further away, so he tried to stand, pushing at Victor’s chest a little. Victor’s expression dropped into shock and he let his arms fall away as Yuuri stood, turning his back to Victor and taking a deep breath.

“I’m sorry?” said Victor behind him. Yuuri shook his head, but couldn’t find words. There was a long moment of stillness before Victor stood up behind him and approached. Yuuri squeezed his eyes shut, bracing himself for Victor to touch him or hug him, but instead Victor sat on the bed about a foot away. Then he laid down on his side, bringing his head into Yuuri’s line of sight. 

“Hi,” he said. Yuuri laughed a little despite himself. And then he sighed and sat down on the floor, facing Victor on the bed. It put their heads on about the same level.

“Did I fuck up?” asked Victor. 

“No,” he replied. “I guess I don’t like talking about it. And I got overwhelmed, you were looking at me and being so close...” He threw up his hands helplessly. He let his head fall to the mattress in front of him. “I’m sorry,” he mumbled into the bed. 

“Maybe we need a signal for when you need a minute, but it’s not my fault?” suggested Victor with a self-conscious wince. “Because I keep being terrified I’m doing and saying all the wrong things.” 

Yuuri took a deep breath and let it out in a long sigh. “Maybe,” he admitted. “What kind of signal?” 

“I don’t know, like a...safeword? Or hand signal?” He frowned. “It was just a thought.” Yuuri shut his eyes for a moment. He hated feeling this...difficult.

“I’m sorry I’m like this,” he whispered.

“Don’t apologize, please. You said you’re not strong, Yuuri, that’s just wrong. You’re so strong. It’s so hard to do what we do. Doing it with this...nervousness? That’s amazing.” Victor’s hand brushed Yuuri’s hair lightly. 

Yuuri blinked, then looked up at Victor. “You’re too nice to me. Why are you so nice?” he said, unaccountably annoyed at Victor’s perfection. Victor looked blank for a moment then barked a laugh.

“There are at least five people I can think of who would choke to hear me called nice.” Yuuri smiled at that. “But if I’m nice to you, it must be because I’m head over heels in love with you.” Victor ended that statement in a breathy tone, as if losing confidence as he went. 

Yuuri blinked up at him and then surged up to capture Victor’s lips. Victor laughed as he rolled with the force of Yuuri’s lunge, arms coming around him to pull Yuuri along. “I don’t know why,” said Yuuri in between breathless kisses.

Victor rolled them so he was on top. He sat up, out of the reach of Yuuri’ mouth. “Because you’re fun, and sweet--”He punctuated each word with a kiss.“--and beautiful, and sexy as hell, and you really...understand skating.” 

“Of course I understand skating,” said Yuuri, flushed under the onslaught of both actions and words. “I’m a skater.”

“No,” Victor shook his head. “Not what I mean. You understand it...instinctively. The way you move, like you’re creating the music rather than following along. You skate like...like you see the same things in it that I do.”

“That’s because I’ve watched _you_ for so long. Because I’ve loved you for so long.” A beat passed, then Yuuri realized what he’d said and his face went bright red. He turned his face to the side. “I mean...”

Victor’s lips brushed his ear and he flinched. “Do you?” whispered Victor. Yuuri’s breathing hitched. 

“God, yes,” he breathed, turning back to Victor. “I do, Victor...Vitya. I...love you.” Victor’s eyes shimmered and mouth curved up. “I fell in love with you years before we ever met. And I know it’s different. You’re different. So different. Better than I imagined. And I...” he couldn’t continue, the words sticking in his throat. But Victor was kissing him anyway, making words redundant. 

They kissed sloppily, both of them enthusiastic and emotional, teeth clacking against each other and lips sliding messily. Victor stretched out on top of him heavily, his robe coming loose as he writhed. Yuuri slid his hands under the fabric to trace across his back. He moved his hands down steadily, finally digging into the meat of Victor’s ass and pressing him down.

“Now, now, don’t get in a hurry,” said Victor, pulling away. “I mean to take things slow and properly make love to you.” Yuuri groaned in mingled complaint and arousal at Victor’s words. Victor hooked a finger under the hem of Yuuri’s t-shirt, pulling it up several inches and then lowering his head to place a line of kisses to his exposed skin. He lifted the shirt agonizingly slowly, mouth trailing behind. Yuuri squirmed beneath him, gasping when Victor finally found his way to his nipples. 

While his boyfriend was occupied sucking on his nipple, Yuuri grasped his shirt and pulled it off over his head. Victor laughed, but didn’t take the hint. Eventually, Victor ran out of new territory to explore with his mouth and he sat up.

“You’re skating tomorrow,” he said. “Should we wait till tomorrow for you to bottom?” 

Yuuri frowned. He had been looking forward to it. “Why? You planning to leave me unable to skate?” 

Victor shrugged. “Some people don’t like to take the risk they might be sore and it might affect their skating,” he explained.

“Well I wasn’t really sore at all last time,” Yuuri said. “And it’s not like it’s a competition skate.” He gave Victor a flirtatious look which won him a smile. 

“Ok, it’s up to you. Turn over,” instructed Victor. A shiver passed through Yuuri’s guts at that, and he complied eagerly. Victor ran his hands over the whole of Yuuri’s back, massaging lightly. He bent and placed a kiss at the top of his spine right under his hair line and then trailed down his spine, kissing lightly as he went. Yuuri broke out in goosebumps, his hips shifting to press his erection against the mattress. 

Finally Victor reached the small of his back, tracing curving patterns with his tongue in the hollow before hooking his hands under the waistband of Yuuri’s pants and tugging them down. Yuuri felt strangely exposed as he was stripped, his face-down position making him feel entirely at Victor’s mercy. 

Victor cupped and kneaded his hands into the globes of Yuuri’s ass. “Mmm, you have the best ass, Yuuri.” And then he brought his mouth to the curve of his left cheek, sucking and nibbling. Yuuri gasped and moaned as Victor explored the area fully. He cried out when Victor’s tongue swiped across the crease where his ass met his thigh, so Victor settled in to stimulate that sensitive spot until Yuuri was breathless. 

Victor slipped a thumb between his cheeks to tease his opening. Yuuri couldn’t hold back an enthusiastic moan at the contact. 

“I made you a promise earlier,” said Victor from between Yuuri’s thighs. “Can I eat your ass?” Yuuri groaned again, just the thought of it sending a quiver through him. 

“Yes,” he said simply. Victor moved then, digging into the drawer and the rustling plastic bag until he found what he was looking for. He set a condom aside and tore open one of the lube packets. Victor pushed a pillow under Yuuri’s hips so his ass was lifted into the air for easier access. Soon Yuuri felt a slick finger against his hole, circling and teasing while it spread the lube. Just the tip pressed into the ring of muscle before pulling back. 

And then Victor was stretching out on his stomach between Yuuri’s legs and holding his cheeks apart with both hands. Yuuri tensed in anticipation of Victor’s tongue but he still jerked when the first wet flick against his opening came. Victor flicked his tongue back and forth, drawing short gasps from Yuuri’s throat each time. Then he pressed his tongue in more firmly, circling and lapping. Yuuri didn’t hold back his sounds of pleasure. Victor’s tongue pressed inside him and he clutched desperately at the sheets. The feeling was unlike anything he’d ever felt: wet and hot and the muscle so mobile, wiggling it’s way inside. Yuuri realized he was moaning Victor’s name now, crying out encouragement as he pressed deeper, fucking in and out slowly. 

Victor’s tongue reached deeper as Yuuri’s body loosened around it, and then he was pressing a slick finger in as well. He worked in and out with just the finger for a while before adding his tongue back to flick and slither Yuuri open wider. In this way he slowly stretched Yuuri open, adding a second and finally third finger. Yuuri was stretched taut between the desire for this to never stop, to keep Victor’s mouth where it was and his increasing need to be properly fucked. His cock and balls ached, ignored and pressed against the pillow under him. 

“Please, Victor, please,” he sobbed. Yuuri didn’t even feel embarrassed by his begging, his shamelessness. He was beyond that now. Victor groaned, withdrew his fingers and moved forward to press his mouth against Yuuri one last time, pressing his tongue in as deeply as it would go, Yuuri squirming back against him. 

Then he was sitting up and reaching for the condom. He pressed Yuuri’s legs together, lifting his hips a little higher and straddling his thighs. Then Yuuri felt the pressure of Victor’s cock against his entrance, and the smooth stretch of his body parting. He moaned as Victor penetrated him slowly and carefully. He was prepared enough there wasn’t any burn and he tried to make his noises encouraging. 

“Damn, you feel good,” murmured Victor against his spine. 

“Yes,” managed Yuuri in response, having difficulty forming words. Soon Victor was moving smoothly within him, still gentle, but the speed of his thrusts picking up. Yuuri tried to look over his shoulder at his lover, but the angle was too difficult. After a while he spoke. “Can we change positions?”

“Sure,” said Victor, voice suddenly concerned. “Are you ok?” He withdrew carefully from Yuuri’s body.

“Yeah, no, I’m fine,” Yuuri said, rolling onto his back. “I just want to see you.” Victor grinned at that, his wide heart-shaped smile. He guided Yuuri’s hips into place on the pillow, pushing his knees up into his chest. 

“Hold your legs up,” he instructed, and Yuuri grabbed onto the back of his knees. Victor pressed back in, sliding all the way in one long push that made them both moan in sync. This new position was better for Yuuri, Victor’s cock setting off more jolts of pleasure inside him. 

They locked eyes while they rocked together, which felt like a new level of intimacy. After a time, Victor shifted to lean over him and Yuuri released his grip on his knees, letting Victor fold him in half with Yuuri’s legs over his shoulders. Once he had a hand free, Yuuri couldn’t resist reaching down and pulling at his neglected erection. 

“God, yes, Yuuri, make yourself come for me,” groaned Victor. Yuuri did his best to comply, feeling himself poised on the edge of orgasm for an endless time until finally one of Victor’s thrusts pushed him over and he shouted, jerking as he came hot across both his and Victor’s stomachs. Victor moaned and thrust into him hard, several times, before he also cried out and shuddered to a halt. 

Yuuri reached for Victor, wrapping his arms around his shoulders and pulling him down on top of him. Victor pulled out of Yuuri before letting himself collapse, so Yuuri wrapped his legs around him as well. 

“I love you,” Yuuri whispered into Victor’s ear. Victor was still breathing hard, his panting tickling against Yuuri’s neck, but he made an appreciative sound in response. They lay wrapped around each other, sweat cooling on their skin, until finally Yuuri had to admit Victor was getting heavy and nudge him to the side. Victor took a moment to clean them up a little and the laid back down.

“So, what’s the verdict?” asked Victor as he settled curled against Yuuri’s side.

“Hmm?”

“Topping or bottoming?” he clarified. 

“Oh. Well, I like both,” he said, wanting to be sure that was clear.

“Yes,” agreed Victor, “but...”

“But, I think I really did like...topping best.” He shifted his gaze to Victor to gauge his reaction. He was smiling.

“I should probably feel offended that I didn’t just rock your world, but I have to confess, I _really_ like bottoming, so I’m pretty happy to hear that.”

“I didn’t say you _didn’t_ rock my world,” Yuuri objected. “Consider me rocked.” Victor chuckled. 

“What did you like about it?” asked Victor slyly. “Topping, I mean.”

“Mmm, I don’t know.” He thought. “I liked being on top, looking down at you. I liked knowing I was making you feel good. And it felt amazing, of course.”

“Mmm, you felt amazing. You feel amazing. You’re amazing.” Victor’s voice went a bit dreamy as he spoke. 

“Vitya,” said Yuuri softly, bending his head to press a kiss to Victor’s hair. “This is too good. How did this happen?”

“Mmm, it’s because you have beautiful eyes,” Victor mumbled. 

“What?” Yuuri laughed.

“When I saw you at the banquet, your eyes stopped me dead.” Yuuri ran his hand up and down Victor’s back. 

“Having good things like this happen makes me scared,” he confessed quietly. Victor made a murmur of acknowledgment. “I feel like something terrible has to be coming.”

Victor shifted, looking up at him, expression serious. “I...understand what you mean. I...I’ve fallen in love before. Too quickly. And it ended badly.” Victor pressed a kiss to the center of Yuuri’s chest. “But I still think...that if..if it’s real...it’s worth the risk.” 

“Vitya,” sighed Yuuri, reaching down to grasp Victor’s face and pull him into a kiss. Victor kissed him deeply, thoroughly, with need. Yuuri initially met Victor’s need with his own, but then relaxed back and let him take whatever he wanted, let him delve and possess.

When the kiss slowed and Victor pulled back with a final drag of his tongue across Yuuri’s lips, they looked into each other’s eyes. 

“I’ve never been in love before,” said Yuuri, the words spilling out unbidden. “Before now.” Victor’s eyes widened and sparkled. “I didn’t know it was so...big.” Yuuri winced and Victor’s expression shifted into one of amusement. Yuuri laughed a bit. “I know that’s not right...so much, maybe. You make me feel a million things at once,” he said finally. 

Victor made a high pitched noise in his throat and buried his face in Yuuri’s chest. He clutched at Yuuri’s shoulders hard. Yuuri hugged him tightly, unable to formulate any more words. Before long, Victor had gone limp and Yuuri realized he’d fallen asleep on his chest. Well he had flown all night to get there, Yuuri reasoned, and tried not to disturb him.

~~~~~

The next morning was a rush of activity, with Yuuri needing to get out the door in time for his scheduled practice, and Victor heading out on his own to shop. Yuuri hadn’t had the time or energy for anything more than a few kisses as he gathered his things. 

When he got back from practice and lunch with Celestino, it was something of a relief to have the room to himself for a while. He cleaned up and lost himself in some mindless television, trying not to think about his upcoming performance too much. Victor returned, arms full of shopping bags, a short time before Yuuri needed to leave again. They kissed each other breathless, but then Yuuri had to go.

“Good luck,” said Victor. “I love you.”

“I love you too,” Yuuri returned, face heating. “I left your pass on the table. I’ll see you after?”

“Of course,” Victor replied, and Yuuri gave him a final kiss before leaving.

He met up with Celestino in the lobby and they headed to the arena. The time until the gala passed in the usual flurry of dressing, stretching, and warm-up. The excitement level backstage was higher than prior to competition. The skaters were less nervous and more bubbly. It grated on Yuuri’s nerves a little, but he did his best to stay focused. 

He was skating last, as the gold medalist, so he had a long wait. He tried to enjoy the other skaters’ performances, but kept getting distracted. Finally it was his turn. His music began with eerie chanting before driving into strong violins and booming drums. This was one of his favorite programs, actually. He’d chosen the music himself: “Liberi Fatali” from _Final Fantasy VIII._ It wasn’t his favorite game of the series, but the song was dramatic and bold. His program played to that, with dizzying spins and step sequences, and a few big jumps that he could confidently land. The music made Yuuri feel strong and powerful. 

Despite the distraction of the lights and the fact that he didn’t get to skate this program often, Yuuri didn’t fall or make any significant mistakes. He finished to a roar of applause and he smiled, a genuine smile that he rarely showed during competition. He left the ice, barely having time to get some water and try to cool down before he was needed for the medal ceremony. The ceremony passed in a blur, Yuuri’s body still thrumming with adrenaline. He accepted his medal and stood on the podium with the tingling knowledge that somewhere Victor was watching him. He had searched the crowd whenever he got a chance, but hadn’t seen any indication of where he might be. 

After the official ceremony ended, Yuuri accepted congratulations from his fellow medalists and various officials. He made himself approach some of the fans crowding against the boards offering flowers or asking for autographs. He blushed and tried not to stammer too much as he thanked them.

“Yuuri!” called a familiar voice. He turned, spotting Victor leaning over the boards about 10 feet away. He was surrounded by fans, most wearing expressions of awe on their faces. He waved at Yuuri, who made his way over to him. 

When he reached Victor, he saw he was holding something: a crown of roses, blue. It was one of Victor’s signatures. Yuuri’s heart pounded as he realized Victor was going to place it on his head. It would be as good as a declaration, a claim staked. He bent his head to allow Victor to place it on his head. Yuuri sensed the flashes of countless cameras in his periphery vision. He locked eyes with Victor and they shared a moment of wordless communication. 

“Thank you,” Yuuri said finally. And then he moved away, heading off to an endless round of photos and interviews. He felt bolstered throughout by the crown of flowers on his head. A few people asked him about Victor’s presence and Yuuri answered vaguely: Victor was visiting on holiday, they were friends, etc.

When he got a moment to breathe, he caught sight of Victor standing along the back wall of the crowded room. He was surrounded by a circle of people and seemed to be fielding questions from his enthusiastic audience. Yuuri started towards him before he’d decided whether to approach or not. When he was still about 10 feet away, Victor looked up and spotted him, and his whole face lit up. He moved through the crowd as if he didn’t see them, meeting Yuuri in the middle of the room. They stood about a foot apart, grinning at each other.

“That’s a lovely crown,” said Victor. “Very flattering. Where did you get it?”

“Oh, this gorgeous man in the audience gave it to me,” replied Yuuri, and Victor’s smile grew even wider. Yuuri couldn’t resist any longer, and he took a step forward and wrapped his arms around Victor in a hug. Victor held him tenderly. 

“Can I kiss you?” whispered Victor in his ear. Yuuri’s face flushed and his stomach turned over. They were standing in a room full of press and cameras. It was a terrible idea. 

“Why not?” he said with a sigh, and Victor pulled back to look at him. Yuuri gave him a small smile, and Victor leaned forward hurriedly, cradling Yuuri’s face with one hand. Yuuri heard gasps from around them as their lips met. And then the sound of camera shutters. He couldn’t help a giggle escaping him and then he and Victor were both smiling against each other’s lips. 

Victor pulled back a few inches. “Ready?” he asked, looking a bit concerned. Yuuri repressed another nervous laugh and nodded. They turned together towards the press pool, shoulder to shoulder. Victor’s arm came around Yuuri’s waist and squeezed. 

When Yuuri saw the expressions of the people staring, the majority of them a combination of shock and delight, he felt a laugh bubble up through him. It rang loudly in the hushed room. For the first time he truly felt as if their relationship was real, and that he belonged at Victor’s side. He looked forward to proving it to everyone else.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The music for Yuuri's exhibition program is [here.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yu1hn3w0Viw) Thanks to enter21 for the suggestion!
> 
> Whew! Ok, so I actually considered adding a chapter 5 and extending this out to cover the rest of their time in Sapporo. But, umm, mostly that would just be more sex and room service, and *points at almost 10,000 words of smut in a hotel room.* But there MIGHT be a little bonus fic at some point about a place I wanted them to visit but couldn't fit in here. 
> 
> As for the future of the series, I intend to continue with the next fic set in Hasetsu, but OMG I have no idea when that will happen. I need a little break and I need to get back to my OTHER Victuuri WIP set in Hasetsu otherwise there's no way I will keep them straight. 
> 
> In the meantime you can follow me on [Tumblr](http://kimthreerings.tumblr.com) to keep up with whatever I do next. Please let me know how you like the chapter because it was such a struggle. Thanks for all your support and enthusiasm for this series, it means the world!

**Author's Note:**

> The title is either a reference to "Getting to Know You" from The King and I or "Wicked Little Town" from Hedwig and the Angry Inch. Your choice. One of them is much less annoying to have stuck in your head.
> 
> I will probably update this later this week with chapter 2. I'm about to finish writing chapter 3. 
> 
> Feedback is love! You can follow me on [Tumblr](http://kimthreerings.tumblr.com) to hear about my struggles picking music for Yuuri's programs, and other fun topics.


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